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Florida Golf Hazard

Why you shouldn't go looking for the golf balls hit 'Out of Bounds'

Florida Golf Hazard thanks to Rod Ewert

This 15 foot Eastern Diamondback rattlesnake was found near the St. Augustine outlet, in a new subdivision just south of Jacksonville, Florida. One bite from a snake of this size would contain enough venom to kill over 40 full grown men.

Florida Golf Hazard thanks to Rod Ewert

This snake is estimated to have weighed over 170 pounds. A snake this size has an approximately 5 1/2 foot accurate striking distance. The distance for an average size rattlesnake is about 2 feet.

Florida Golf Hazard thanks to Rod Ewert

The head of this snake alone is larger than the hand of a normal-sized man. The knife being used to draw out the fangs has a blade around 6 inches long.

QuotaBills
I'm a golfer, not an athlete. - Lee Westwood

You drive for show but putt for dough. - Bobby Locke

Work: The thing that interferes with golf. - Frank Dane

Golf, like measles, should be caught young. - P G Wodehouse

If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. - Dean Martin

Real golfers don't miss putts, they get robbed. - Unknown

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. - H G Wells

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. - Will Rogers

Are we playing Men's Rules today or do we count every putt? - Unknown

Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown

If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake. - Bern Williams

You realize just how bad a golfer you are when you play with Freddie. - Donald Trump

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. - Joey Adams

They call it golf because all of the other four-letter names were taken. - Ray Floyd

When the snake is in the house, one need not discuss the matter at length. - African Saying

If you see a snake, just kill it - don't appoint a committee on snakes. - H. Ross Perot

Show me a good loser and I'll show you a man playing golf with his boss. - Unknown

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

One of the quickest ways to meet new people is to pick up the wrong ball on a golf course. - Unknown

Our technological powers increase, but the side effects and potential hazards also escalate. - Alvin Toffler

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. - Robert Lynd

I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser. - Arnold Palmer

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields

The biggest battle is never on the field, the fairway, the diamond or rink: it's in your mind. - Carey Neuhoff

I played golf. I didn't get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying. - Mitch Hedberg

Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey

The reason your golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can't see him laughing. - Phyllis Diller

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either use one more club or two more balls. - Unknown

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. - Ernest Hemingway

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. - Tiger Woods

Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. - Arthur Daley

Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden

Edible: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


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