#1 humor site on the 'net

Endangered Maui Monkeys

Why monkeys are rare in Hawaii

Endangered Maui Monkeys thanks to joe-kster

Endangered Maui Monkeys thanks to joe-kster

Two Hawaaian natives making a brass of themselves

Endangered Maui Monkeys thanks to joe-kster

Primates used in Maui brassrooms

Endangered Maui Monkeys thanks to joe-kster

QuotaBills
Grief is a species of idleness. - Samuel Johnson

A rich man has no need of character. - Hebrew Proverb

Paddy O Furniture: Irish lawn chairs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Xerocks: Two identical pieces of stone - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It is better to live rich than die rich. - Samuel Johnson

A hallucination is a species of reality. - Terence McKenna

Bonjour, you cheese-eating surrender monkeys. - Groundskeeper Willie

Part of the beauty of me is that I am very rich. - Donald Trump

The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail. - Stephen Fry

Being rich is having money, being wealthy is having time. - Stephen Swid

Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense. - Josh Billings

By trying often, the monkey learns to jump from the tree. - Cameroon Proverb

Finding your style is like putting puzzle pieces together. - Lara Spencer

Few rich men own their own property. The property owns them. - Robert G Ingersoll

The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room. - Unknown

Men do not desire to be rich, but to be richer than other men. - John S Mill

After a rich man gets rich, his next ambition is to get richer. - American Proverb

God can heal a broken heart, but He has to have all the pieces. - Unknown

I have a furniture problem. My chest has fallen into my drawers. - Billy Casper

Life is a rich strain of music, suggesting a realm too fair to be. - George William Curtis

Colors must fit together as pieces in a puzzle or cogs in a wheel. - Hans Hofmann

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

If you are out to describe the truth, leave elegance to the tailor. - Albert Einstein

I gave you my heart, I just didn't expect to get it back in pieces. - Unknown

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? - George Carlin

How easy it is for a man to die rich, if he will but be contented to live miserable. - Henry Fielding

If the rich could pay people to die for them, the poor could make a wonderful living. - Yiddish Proverb

You cannot sift out the poor from the community. The poor are indispensable to the rich. - Henry Ward Beacher

Lemonade is made from artificial flavors, and furniture polish is made from real lemons. - Alfred E Newman

Writing is like sewing together what I call these 'buttons,' these bits and pieces. - Sandra Cisneros

We all get the same amount of ice. The rich get it in the summer. The poor get it in the winter. - Bat Masterson

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

Bill Gates is a very rich man today, and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions. - Dave Barry

I was freelancing for years in Cork and around. I also wrote freelance pieces for 'The Irish Times.' - Kevin Barry

Life isn't about finding pieces of a puzzle. It's about creating and putting those exceptional pieces together. - Unknown

Science is a first-rate piece of furniture for a man’s upper chamber, if he has common sense on the ground floor. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer. - Jim Carrey

I never met a rich man who was happy, but I have only very occasionally met a poor man who did not want to become a rich man. - Malcolm Muggeridge

I am quite sure now that often in matters concerning religion and politics, a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkeys. - Mark Twain

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer


'Piece of Cake' Resignation Letter

Bee Safe

Catfish Noodling

I'm A Believer

Sewing Sculpture

Greatest Italian Riders

Batman Recession

Sinus Remedy - How To Clear Out Your Nostrils

About Grandparents

Split Personality Ad

Happy Bithday

Back 2 School Savings

Redneck Wine Dispenser

Balloon Advertising for Exploding Results

Cowboy Baby Carrier

Make Womb For Baby

Turtle Truck

Zipper Building

Hobo Facebook

Cart Man - Biker To The Rescue

'I Look Like My Dog' Contest

Employee Happiness Kit

Back To School Supplies

Pigeon Target Practice