#1 humor site on the 'net

Driving Tip For The Elderly

When you know it's time to stop driving

Driving Tip For The Elderly thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Old age is the verdict of life. - Amelia E Barr

Old age is no place for sissies. - Bette Davis

Cherish youth, but trust old age. - Pueblo Proverb

Old age is like underwear, it creeps up on you. - Unknown

I know I can't cheat death, but I can cheat old age. - Darwin Deason

If youth had but the knowledge and old age the strength. - French Proverb

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves. - Phyllis Diller

Fourty is the old age of youth; 50 is the youth of old age. - Victor Hugo

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life. - Daniel F E Auber

The old age of an eagle is better than the youth of a sparrow. - Proverb

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man. - Leon Trotsky

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

Man fools himself. He prays for a long life, and he fears an old age. - Chinese Proverb

Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on. - Maxwell Maltz

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

In youth we run into difficulties; in old age difficulties run into us. - Josh Billings

Sure I'm for helping the elderly. I'm going to be old myself some day. - Lillian Carter

Old age takes away what we've inherited and gives us what we've earned. - Gerald Brenan

Youth is the time of getting, middle age of improving, and old age of spending. - Anne Bradstreet

W.C. Fields has a profound respect for old age. Especially when it's bottled. - Gene Fowler

Children are a great comfort in your old age, and they help you reach it faster, too. - Lionel Kauffman

Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young. - Fred Astaire

Learning is an ornament in prosperity, a refuge in adversity, and a provision in old age. - Aristotle

The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball. - Doug Larson

Life as pool table,
White is focus,
Others, targets.
Stick is your driving force! - Stricketer

When grace is joined with wrinkles, it is adorable. There is an unspeakable dawn in happy old age. - Victor Hugo

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

In youth the days are short and the years are long; in old age the years are short and the days are long. - Nikita I Panin

Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard, there is nothing you can do about it. - Golda Meir

While we drink, and call for garlands, for perfumes and for maidens, old age is creeping on us unperceived. - Juvenal

Autumn is really the best of the seasons; and I'm not sure that old age isn't the best part of life. - C S Lewis

In old age we are like a batch of letters that someone has sent. We are no longer in the post, we have arrived. - Knut Hamsun

The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm. - Aldous Huxley

I'm grateful that I never was that senior athlete who realized she'd done nothing but train all her life. - Clara Hughes

One should never make one's debut in a scandal. One should reserve that to give interest to one's old age. - Oscar Wilde

May you keep dreaming until the day you die. May imagination overtake memory. May you die young at a ripe old age. - Mark Batterson

Eating a tuna roll at a sushi restaurant should be considered no more environmentally benign than driving a Hummer or harpooning a manatee. - Daniel Pauly

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. - Kendare Blake


Redneck Christmas Tree Transport

Three Cats Ago

That's Not A Knife

Someone Is Upset

Turkey Popcorn Dressing

Redneck Outhouse Throne

I'll Be Right There

How Not To Prop Start Your Plane

Young Superman

When Not To Stop Too Fast

Bustache

CheckMate

Plane Oops!

Sand Dive

Manitoba Home Security System

WinDoor

Bungee Cord Suspenders

Mirror Solution

Beerbulance

Handicap Motorcyclist

Filling Up Is OverRated

Coin Stacking

I Miss Being A Tree

Stoned In The Garden