#1 humor site on the 'net

Chipotie Burger

New 'Chips and ties' special at McDonald's

Chipotie Burger thanks to Leigh-Ann Thornhill

QuotaBills
Dinner is poured. - WC Fields

Keep a clean kitchen - dine out. - Unknown

I'm having an old friend for dinner. - The Silence of the Lambs

Soviet: What Russians say when they finish dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you wish to grow thinner, diminish your dinner. - H.S. Leigh

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach. - WC Fields

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

Out for lunch. If not back by five, out for dinner also. - Unknown

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

Electroplate: What atomic scientists eat their dinner from - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We're eating dinner soon. Don't fill up on homework. - Alex Baze

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. - Fran Lebowitz

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Be prompt and you dine alone. - Gerald Barzan

Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist. - G K Chesterton

The man who can dominate a London dinner-table can dominate the world. - Oscar Wilde

My metabolism stinks. I can gain weight just listening to dinner music. - Ron Dentinger

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James Beard

Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a pauper. - Adelle Davis

After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one's own relations. - Oscar Wilde

Dinner and a movie? Forget that. I'd rather have a picnic and a waterfall. - Amanda Grace

Couch Potato: What Mom finds under the sofa cushions after the kids eat dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste. - Wes Smith

My body is like breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I don't think about it, I just have it. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. - James Bovard

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

The truly free man is the one who will turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse. - Jules Renard

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, 'if you want it your way, cook it yourself.' - Johnny Carson

I had a feeling once about mathematics – that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go. - Winston Churchill

When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face.
That's the price she has to pay. - Groucho Marx

Food: The response Mom usually gives in answer to the question, "What's for dinner tonight?" - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner. - H L Mencken

I'm into all that sappy stuff - a surprise picnic, nice dinner, or traveling. I'm kind of an old romantic. - Will Estes

Because of their cuisine, Germans don't consider farting rude. They'd certainly be out of luck if they did. - P.J. O'Rourke

I have done a Hamburger Helper commercial, a Hardees commercial, a McDonalds commercial. American Express commercial. - Luke Benward

Poverty is an anomaly to rich people. It is very difficult to make out why people who want dinner do not ring the bell. - Walter Bagehot

I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner. - WC Fields

It is very vulgar to talk about one's business. Only people like stockbrokers do that, and then merely at dinner parties. - Oscar Wilde

I'm Irish, so I'm used to odd stews. I can take it. Just throw a lot of carrots and onions in there and I'll call it dinner. - Liam Neeson


Photo Scratch

Yoda-Churchill

Cup of Mona Lisa

Bar Walker

Olympic Moon Rings

BTTF II Car

Pool Garden

Lunch Break on a Hot Day

Wait For My Human

China Road Load

Burger King Street

Taking The Bait

Redneck Tailgate

Horse Model

What Has America Become?

Billionaire Thoughts

New Style Ribs

Beware Of Sign

Into Fitness - Part I

Puddle Bath

Olympic Hurdle Joe

Katoomba Railway

The Importance Of Education

New Events for Summer Olympics