Booze Wedding

Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

Hare Brush: Used to groom a rabbit - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

I could not get the ring without the finger. - Thomas Middleton

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. - Ruth Bell Graham

The woman cries before the wedding and the man after. - Polish Proverb

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills. - Groucho Marx

Keep thy eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterward. - Thomas Fuller

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle

Tenderness is greater proof of love than the most passionate of vows. - Marlene Dietrich

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of. - WC Fields

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

I believe in love and marriage, but not necessarily with the same person. - John Travolta

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

Never knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run away. Death hates that. - Matt Frewer

A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. - Irwin Corey

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

A good marriage was one in which each person thought he or she was getting the better deal. - Anne Lamott

Real, sustainable community change requires the initiative and engagement of community members. - Helene D Gayle

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force. - Ogden Nash

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

For two people in a marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the only miracle the Vatican has overlooked. - Bill Cosby

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is. - Milton Berle

One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst