#1 humor site on the 'net

You Want Me To Do What?

Sometimes we ask too much of our friends

You Want Me To Do What? thanks to Diane Baugh

QuotaBills
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Love, and do what you like. - St. Augustine

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Only do what your heart tells you. - Princess Diana

Zit: Command given to a spotted dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffett

The more I see of men, the more I like dogs. - Madame de Stael

The time is always ripe to do what is right. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

A good bone does not always come to a good dog. - French Proverb

Dogs got personality. Personality goes a long way. - Quentin Tarantino

The police are recruited from the criminal classes. - Gore Vidal

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. - Corey Ford

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

Gigantic: The biggest, scariest bug in your dog's fur - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

The quickest way to become an old dog is to stop learning new tricks. - John Rooney

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be. - Steven Seagal

Success is simple. Do what's right, the right way, at the right time. - Arnold H Glasow

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

The thing about living with any disability is that you adapt; you do what works for you. - Stella Young

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

Faith is not the belief that God will do what you want. It is the belief that God will do what is right. - Max Lucado

Leadership is getting someone to do what they don't want to do, to achieve what they want to achieve. - Tom Landry

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee

Ever wonder where you'd end up if you took your dog for a walk and never once pulled back on the leash? - Robert Brault

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

I'm being kidnapped by a comforter, sheet and pillow. No need to call the police for I will be released by morning. - Unknown

Sloth is the failure to do what needs to be done when it needs to be done - like the kamikaze pilot who flew seventeen missions. - John Ortberg

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

If a woman says, 'Do what you want', do not do what you want. Stand still. Do not blink. Don't even breathe. Just play dead. - Unknown

You do what you can for as long as you can, and when you finally can't you do the next best thing. You back up, but you don't give up. - Chuck Yeager

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


Gold Bar Carrot Cake

Looking For A Mate

Food For Thought

Kanye Twitty

Skull Tentacles

Ukrainian Cattle Car

CreepEye

Canadian Whiskey

Winter Tree

WrenchWare

Dog Sled

Winter Ready

Bread Dress

Bear With Me

Open-air schools in The Netherlands

Ghost Food

Toothpaste Holder

Two Face

Redneck Porch Hunter

Jeep Words

Elton or Eltoff?

Finger Physio

Fish Eye Lens

Nice Try, China