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Ukrainian Air Conditioning

Jethro-fit models plug right into your engine block!

Ukrainian Air Conditioning thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
What makes the engine go? Desire, desire, desire. - Stanley Kunitz

Suffering is the fuel in the engine of civilization. - Matthew W. Stover

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

It is sometimes as dangerous to be run into by a microbe as by a trolley car. - J.J. Walsh

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

You have to look for teachers. If you want to be a mechanic, go hang out with mechanics. - Robert Kiyosaki

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

HonkoSecond: The time between the light turning green and the sound from the car horn behind you - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

It is questionable if all the mechanical inventions yet made have lightened the day's toil of any human being. - John S Mill

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Lunch Break

Digging One's Own Grave

See The Difference?

Gas and Dash

OctoMask

Bird on a Wire (past tense)

Workplace Hazards in Tasmania

Tiger On A Roll

Men's Golf Rules

Where Did He Go?

Sudden Invented Syndrome

Calculus Drinks

Lights, Camera, Overreaction

Rebar Walker

Leading The Way

Melted Dog

Painful Ballet

Welder's Last Stand

My Life Goal

1-800-PILLCASH

Ghetto Boat

Hungry Hiker Tree

Redneck Roof

My Last Swim In The Ocean