#1 humor site on the 'net

Texas Motorcycle Seat

Mobile police force for gun-n-run security

Texas Motorcycle Seat thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Texas is as odd as it is vast. - Henry Rollins

Olfactory: Texas petroleum refinery - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The people of Texas want us to secede! - William Clements

The perfect man? A poet on a motorcycle. - Lucinda Williams

You can always tell a Texan, but not much. - Unknown

Parts of Texas look like Kansas with a goiter. - Unknown

Those who have free seats at a play hiss first. - Chinese Proverb

I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. - Molly Ivins

Texas is a hotbed of insanely good bands and musicians. - Henry Rollins

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq. - Fran Lebowitz

Harlez Vous Francais?: Can you drive a French motorcycle? - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot

If you stand up and be counted, someone will take your seat. - Unknown

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

Tragedy: a busload of lawyers going over a cliff with an empty seat. - Unknown

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. - Red Skelton

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Tupac was one of the biggest thugs I know - and he always wore his seat belt. - Ice Cube

The landscape of Texas is in all my work. It's that light; it's that sky. - Robert Wilson

If you're offered a seat on a rocket ship, don't ask what seat! Just get on. - Sheryl Sandberg

Most motorcycle problems are caused by the nut that connects the handlebars to the saddle. - Unknown

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

Most of my memories of Texas are of mosquitoes, watermelons, crickets, and my brother teasing me. - Robin Wright

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

Stay in your seat come times of trouble. Its only people who jump off the roller coaster who get hurt. - Paul Harvey

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

A university is an institution that has two thousand seats in the classrooms and eighty thousand in the stadium. - Unknown

Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands? And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewellery. - John Lennon

I'll see you at the opera tonight. I'll hold your seat till you get there. After that, you're on your own. - Groucho Marx

People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs. - Unknown

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

I have close to 30,000 now. At this rate we'll have in excess of 40,000. Last year we had 33,000 season seats and averaged about 40,000 fans per game. - Donald Trump

The pleasure of jogging and running is rather like that of wearing a fur coat in Texas in August: the true joy comes in being able to take the damn thing off. - Joseph Epstein

If you want to surf, move to Hawaii. If you like to shop, move to New York. If you like acting and Hollywood, move to California. But if you like college football, move to Texas. - Ricky Williams

A motorcycle functions entirely in accordance with the laws of reason, and a study of the art of motorcycle maintenance is really a miniature study of the art of rationality itself. - Robert M. Pirsig


7 Hours In 1 Image

Mexican School Bus

Tree Sorrow

OCD Electrician

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Redneck Shower Head

Wise Moves

Fox Hunting Madness

Emperor Penguins

The Side Effects of Veganism

Stair Railing Electrician

Cold Faucet

Make Womb For Baby

Hardtail Bike

Birth Control Kit

Come-Back Line Of The Year

Duck Gears

Chewing Gum Hazard

Keyboard Seating

Bent Over

Whatchamacallit Car

Gone To Market

Peak Bernie

Female IT Experts