#1 humor site on the 'net

Short On Electricity

How not to wire an electrical switch

Short On Electricity thanks to Carol Thornton

QuotaBills
Electrical degenerators - Archie Bunker

A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle. - James Keller

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Often a lack of energy is considered to be patience. - Kin Hubbard

America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric. - Doug Hamwell

Energy is liberated matter; matter is energy waiting to happen. - Bill Bryson

Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire. - William Butler Yeats

Enthusiasm finds the opportunities, and energy makes the most of them. - Henry Hoskins

Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle

I cannot hold onto grudges. It's a waste of energy, a waste of time. - Phil Anselmo

Energy, like the Biblical grain of the mustard seed, will remove mountains. - Hosea Ballou

We're all just ghosts on a wire seeking the prick of an electric thought. - Robert Fanney

Research is the historical novelist's map, constraint, and purest energy. - Donald McCaig

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal. - Albert Camus

As long as we have hope, we have direction, the energy to move, and the map to move by. - Hong Kong Proverb

My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair. - Rodney Dangerfield

Life engenders life. Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich. - Sarah Bernhardt

The more you lose yourself in something bigger than yourself, the more energy you will have. - Norman Vincent Peale

Put your energy into making things that are likeable, not some douchey social media strategy. - Matthew Inman

I've got more energy now than when I was younger because I know exactly what I want to do. - George Balanchine

In times of great stress or adversity, plow your anger and your energy into something positive. - Lee Iacocca

I just like having fun. And, you know, sometimes I just like to present myself in that fun energy. - Katy Perry

Imagine a place where everyone chooses to bring energy, passion, and a positive attitude every day. - Stephen C. Lundin

You get the best effort from others not by lighting a fire beneath them, but by building a fire within. - Bob Nelson

I was training to be an electrician. I suppose I got wired the wrong way round somewhere along the line. - Elvis Presley

How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter? - Woody Allen

Milton's style was exactly right for what he did. He had enormous energy. Enormous vitality. He still does. - Steve Allen

If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy, and inspires your hopes. - Andrew Carnegie

Discussing positive experiences leads to heightened well-being, increased overall life satisfaction and even more energy. - Nathaniel Lambert

Yoga is invigoration in relaxation. Freedom in routine. Confidence through self control. Energy within and energy without. - Ymber Delecto

When you're following your energy and doing what you want all the time, the distinction between work and play dissolves. - Shakti Gawain

The fundamental concept in social science is Power, in the same sense in which Energy is the fundamental concept in physics. - Bertrand Russell

Direct your energy toward achieving a goal, and tackle the problems with an emphasis on edging closer to a successful result. - Harvey Mackay

Atomic energy might be as good as our present-day explosives, but it is unlikely to produce anything very much more dangerous. - Winston Churchill

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have. - Dale Carnegie

Every sort of energy and endurance, of courage and capacity for handling life's evils, is set free in those who have religious faith. - William James

Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence. This explains why we have so many stupid leaders. - Sloan Wilson

The capacity for hope is the most significant fact of life. It provides human beings with a sense of destination and the energy to get started. - Norman Cousins


Just Blew It

Water Taxi

SailBite Ride - Swimming Not Advised

Bach To Front

Japanese Diving Platform

Radar Replacement

Customers Wanted

How To Burn Fat

Cuban Cuisine

FishSun - Touching The Sun

Trampoline Apartment

Slamming On Your Brakes

UFO Caught On Tape

His Dent

Attentive Student

The Great Depression

Divorce Defined

Paint Ladder

Spanish Restrooms

First Computer Cursor

Arsenic Wafers

Car Surgeon

Rust-ic Truck

Aisle Cleanup