Road Press

Never insult anyone by accident. - Robert A. Heinlein

There is no royal road to geometry. - Euclid

Defendit numerus: There is safety in numbers. - Unknown

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

Substance is not enough, accident is also required. - Greek Proverb

Freedom of the press is limited to those who own one. - A.J. Liebling

The road is hard, and you have to get accustomed to it. - Miranda Lambert

The road was new to me, as roads always are going back. - Sarah O Jewett

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

Water Hazard: Giving the kids too much to drink before a road trip - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We better not, ya know, kill our chickens before they cross the road. - Archie Bunker

Your own safety is at stake when your neighbor's house is in flames. - Horace

He really is terribly heavy going. Like running up hill in roller skates. - Alan Ayckbourn

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

The Bible does not give us a road map for life, but it does give us a compass. - Gordon S. Jackson

Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion. - Mark Twain

An opening statement is like a guide or a road map. It's a very delicate thing. - Johnnie Cochran

You can always tell when you are on the road to success; it's uphill all the way. - Paul Harvey

Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art. - Eleanor Roosevelt

When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges. - Jack Handy

HonkoSecond: The time between the light turning green and the sound from the car horn behind you - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

Press forward. Do not stop, do not linger in your journey, but strive for the mark set before you. - George Whitefield

For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press three. - Alice Kahn

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth - not going all the way, and not starting. - Buddha

Put least trust in him who is foremost to praise you,
Nor judge of a road till it draw to the end. - John B O'Reilly

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

"Officer, I know I was going faster than 55 MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the road an hour." - Steven Wright

All you have to do is look straight and see the road, and when you see it, don't sit looking at it - walk. - Ayn Rand

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Never look down to test the ground before taking your next step; only he who keeps his eye fixed on the far horizon will find his right road. - Dag Hammarskjold

Hastiness and superficiality are the psychic diseases of the 20th century, and more than anywhere else this disease is reflected in the press. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright