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Redneck Doork

Bubba's solution for a confined space restroom

Redneck Doork thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Turkish Bath: A pool room - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Can Opener: Key to the washroom - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When one door shuts, a hundred open. - Spanish Proverb

If you want the girl next door, go next door. - Joan Crawford

Confidence is the hinge on the door to success. - Mary O'Hare Dumas

Monarchy: Used to open doors in a Royal Palace. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

At the deaf man's door, knock as much as you like. - Greek Proverb

I never feel so much myself as when I'm in a hot bath. - Sylvia Plath

All successful revolutions are the kicking in of a rotten door. - John Kenneth Galbraith

If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door. - Paul Beatty

Trouble knocked at the door, but, hearing laughter, hurried away. - Benjamin Franklin

When grandparents enter the door, discipline flies out the window. - Ogden Nash

My grandmother took a bath every year, whether she was dirty or not. - Brendan Behan

Most of the time he sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper. - Rex Reed

listen; there's a hell of a good universe next door: let's go - e e cummings

Follow your bliss and doors will open where there were no doors before. - Joseph Campbell

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio. - Rodney Dangerfield

I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly. - Rod Stewart

He who is outside his door has the hardest part of his journey behind him. - Flemish Proverb

Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open. - John Barrymore

Don't spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door. - Coco Chanel

Opportunity does not knock. It presents itself when you beat down the door. - Kyle Chandler

High school is a lot like toilet paper: you only miss it when it's gone. - Unknown

He who is outside the door has already a good part of his journey behind him. - Dutch Proverb

Never knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run away. Death hates that. - Matt Frewer

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

Temptation usually comes in through a door that has deliberately been left open. - Arnold Glasow

The door that nobody else will go in at seems always to swing open widely for me. - Clara Barton

Let everyone leave all the guns - British guns and Irish guns - outside the door. - Martin McGuinness

Imagination, of course, can open any door - turn the key and let terror walk right in. - Truman Capote

Some people not only expect opportunity to knock, they expect it to beat the door down. - Unknown

A true friend is the one that's coming in the door while everyone else is going out. - Dr. Phil McGraw

The cure for a broken heart is simple, my lady. A hot bath and a good night's sleep. - Margaret George

The present moment is the only moment available to us, and it is the door to all moments. - Thich Nhat Hanh

You know that I'm at death's door. But the trouble is that I'm afraid to knock. - W Somerset Maugham

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Music Lover: A man, who upon hearing a soprano in the bathroom, puts his ear to the keyhole - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If the doors of perception were cleansed, everything would appear to man as it is: infinite. - William Blake

I look just like the girls next door... if you happen to live next door to an amusement park. - Dolly Parton

At the door of life, by the gate of breath, there are worse things waiting for men than death. - A.C. Swinburne The Triumph Of Time

I want a house with a garden, but slap bang in the centre of London. Next door to a sushi bar. - Michelle Dockery

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Have you ever wondered why opportunity only knocks once, yet temptation bangs on the door constantly? - Unknown

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Don't waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window - or break down a door. - Brooke Shields

I had a job selling hearing aids from door to door. It wasn't easy, because your best prospects never answered. - Bob Monkhouse

Monkey: 1. An arboreal animal which makes itself at home in genealogical trees; 2. A key that won't open a door. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

May you always walk in sunshine. May you never want for more. May Irish angels rest their wings right beside your door. - Irish Blessings

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home. - Rodney Dangerfield

Forgiveness is a way of opening up the doors again and moving forward, whether it's a personal life or a national life. - Hillary Clinton

The truth knocks on the door and you say, "Go away, I'm looking for the truth," and so it goes away. Puzzling. - Robert M Pirsig

I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine. - Milton Berle

My friend Sally is a nudist. I went to her house. The closets have no doors. The walls are covered with see-through wallpaper. - Steven Wright

No business can stay in business without customers. How you treat - or mistreat - them determines how long your doors stay open. - Harvey Mackay

It's like running a marathon race. We train all hours of the day. When you are taking a bath, you are thinking of the flight. - Kalpana Chawla

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

A beautiful woman moved in next door. So I went over and returned a cup of sugar. "You didn't borrow this." "I will." - Steven Wright

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Thirteen roadways lead through life
To thirteen doors of death,
Homeward from foolish fears and strife
We float on failing breath. - Tao

Under the present circumstances, I would rather be a lap dancer than a woman MP - the hours are better and unruly male members are shown the door. - Allison Pearson

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


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