#1 humor site on the 'net

Math Dice

When a mathematician knows he's on a roll

Math Dice thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Everything is physics and math. - Katherine Johnson

College is a refuge from hasty judgment. - Robert Frost

I go to school the youth to learn the future. - Robert Frost

Mathematics knows no races or geographic boundaries. - David Hilbert

Pure mathematics, may it never be of any use to anyone. - Henry Smith

I am an expert in Higher Level Math: You + God = Enough - Zig Ziglar

Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something. - Wilson Mizner

Math, it's a puzzle to me. I love figuring out puzzles. - Maya Lin

Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education. - Mark Twain

Math is like love - a simple idea but it can get complicated. - R. Drabek

I was a great student at a great school, Wharton School of Finance. - Donald Trump

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

Law school is the opposite of sex. Even when it's good it's lousy. - Unknown

God not only plays dice, he throws them in the corner where you can't see them. - Stephen Hawking

Let us grant that the pursuit of mathematics is a divine madness of the human spirit. - Alfred Whitehead

The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness. - Robert M. Hutchins

I can get motivated seeing a kid at my son's school overcome a learning disability. - Jason Alexander

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater. - Albert Einstein

Mathematics is a game played according to certain simple rules with meaningless marks on paper. - David Hilbert

If everybody in the world dropped out of school, we would have a much more intelligent society. - Jaden Smith

There are 3 kinds of people in this world: those who are good at math, and those who aren't. - Unknown

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

If I feel unhappy, I do mathematics to become happy. If I am happy, I do mathematics to keep happy. - Alfred Renyi

I had a feeling once about mathematics – that I saw it all... but it was after dinner and I let it go. - Winston Churchill

Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years. - George Burns

It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged off me during school term. - Mark Twain

In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence. - Steven Wright

What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather

I played basketball in high school, and I love watching sports - I'll watch everything except maybe hockey. - Andy Roddick

You can go your whole life and not need math or physics for a minute, but the ability to tell a joke is always handy. - Garrison Keillor

There are advantages to being President. The day after I was elected, I had my high school grades classified Top Secret. - Ronald Reagan

In my last year of school, I was voted Class Optimist and Class Pessimist. Looking back, I realize I was only half right. - Jack Nicholson

I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at four in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today. - George Foreman

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

Mathematics takes us into the region of absolute necessity, to which not only the actual word, but every possible word, must conform. - Bertrand Russell

My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry. - Milton Berle

Mathematics is not a careful march down a well-cleared highway, but a journey into a strange wilderness where the explorers often get lost. - W.S. Anglin

Mathematics began to seem too much like puzzle solving. Physics is puzzle solving, too, but of puzzles created by nature, not by the mind of man. - Maria G. Mayer

I was thrown out of college during my freshman year, for cheating on my metaphysics final - I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. - Woody Allen


Crocodile Fall

Hoodie Onesy

BUSker

Monsoon TV

Worked For Them

Colon Celery

Hot Tub Cover

Piano Dress

Parking Guide

Apology to Potential Criminals

Before Morning Coffee

Sons Of Arthritis

Challenge Accepted

Subway Camouflage

In Stitches

Great White

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Can I Lick It

It Was A Dark And Stormy Night

Velociraptor Defined

Redneck Muffler Repair

Drama Queen Diary

He Looks Just Like His Father!

Happy Snow Car