#1 humor site on the 'net

Manitoba Cold

This sums up Manitoba's weather this week

Manitoba Cold thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
My soul is in the sky. - William Shakespeare

Women hold up half the sky. - Mao Zedong

The sky already fell. Now what? - Steven Wright

Weather forecast for tonight: dark. - George Carlin

Revenge is a dish best served cold. - Italian Proverb

I talk to God but the sky is empty. - Sylvia Plath

You bring your own weather to the picnic. - Harlan Coben

Climate is what we expect. Weather is what we get. - Mark Twain

The way is not in the sky. The way is in the heart. - Buddha

Her absence is like the sky, spread over everything. - C S Lewis

He who has the property in the soil has the same up in the sky. - Latin Proverb

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

Sadness is more or less like a head cold - with patience, it passes. - Barbara Kingsolver

Work and pray, live on hay, you'll get pie in the sky when you die. - Joe Hill

Problems that are procrastinated on are only amplified. Be the buffalo. - Unknown

Thank God men cannot as yet fly and lay waste the sky as well as the earth. - Henry David Thoreau

People who take cold baths never have rheumatism, but they have cold baths. - American Proverb

Advice from your friends is like the weather, some of it is good, some of it is bad. - Unknown

I should rather men ask why no statue has been erected in my honour, than why one has. - Marcus Porcius Cato

Though so trifling, the success of our first Buffalo hunt gave us quite a social lift. - Ernest T. Seton

A bad cold wouldn't be so annoying if it weren't for the advice of our friends. - Kin Hubbard

A cold wind was blowing from the north, and it made the trees rustle like living things. - George R.R. Martin

Let's get an extended weather forecast from a jittery, inconsistent, reddish brown rodent. - Unknown

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

I think the genetics of being Irish are that you sort of prefer when it's rainy and cloudy. - Kate Flannery

Few Indians only had breech cloths, most being wrapped in buffalo robes, otherwise quite naked. - Zebulon Pike

My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. - Woody Allen

Never pay attention to what critics say. Remember, a statue has never been set up in honor of a critic. - Jean Sibelius

I recommend that the Statue of Liberty be supplemented by a Statue of Responsibility on the west coast. - Viktor Frankl

The visions are fragmented and a dark cloud spreads like spilt ink across the pages of possible futures. - Garth Nix

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up. - Jay Leno

Life is no different than the weather. Not only is it unpredictable, but it shows us a new perspective of the world every day. - Suzy Kassem

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it, and wrong too often for us to rely on it. - Patrick Young

The long, dull, monotonous years of middle-aged prosperity or middle-aged adversity are excellent campaigning weather for the devil. - C S Lewis

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

It's better to look at the sky than live there. Such an empty place; so vague. Just a country where the thunder goes and things disappear. - Truman Capote

I had fried octopus last night. You have to be really quiet when you eat it. Otherwise, it emits a cloud of black smoke and falls on the floor. - Steven Wright

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump

The spirit is smothered, as it were, by ignorance, but so soon as ignorance is destroyed, spirit shines forth, like the sun when released from clouds. - Sankara


Should Have Pulled Out

Leonardo da Vinci's Unfinished Portrait

Cooking For Guys

One Sushi Is Enough

Before Online Dating

Wood Trike

Crow Species

Young or Old Swimmer?

Japanese Keyboard

Baby Peephole

Exit Not Found

Cat Burglar

Foot Race

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Lockdown Advice

Wii Way

Odor Detector

Associate Demonstration

Biden in the Oval Office

Poor Fishing Day

Mustache Breeze

Chain Weave Hairstyle

Jar of Birds

Wheely Unstable