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Looking Small

How to downsize your spouse

Looking Small thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Looking Small thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

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Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job. - Zig Ziglar

The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. - Chinese Proverb

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it. - Steven Wright

My wife and I are getting remarried. Our divorce didn't work out. - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife likes the hockey smell because it's the smell of a warrior. - David Walton

Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly. - Morticia Addams

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. - Rodney Dangerfield

Heed the still small voice that so seldom leads us wrong, and never into folly. - Marquise du Deffand

Antitoxidote cruisin' through my system looking for some disease to attack. - Archie Bunker

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her. - Red Skelton

All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express. - Milton Berle

An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out. - George Jean Nathan

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me to time an egg. - Rodney Dangerfield

A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life. - Unknown

Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Like the cosmetics industry, the securities business is engaged in selling illusion. - Paul Samuelson

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together. - Vincent van Gogh

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden. - Corrie ten Boom

Most people would succeed in small things if they were not troubled with great ambitions. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

You will become as small as your controlling desire; as great as your dominant aspiration. - James Allen

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

Happiness hides in life's small details. If you're not looking, it becomes invisible. - Joyce Brothers

I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with 28 years ago. - Will Rogers

Keep your eye out for hot topics and trends. The media is constantly looking for timely stories. - Jim Kukral

Faithfulness in small things leads to faithfulness in great things, and never the other way around. - Jerry L. Lewis

The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley

A small group of thoughtful people could change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, "I was just whispering in her mouth". - Groucho Marx

You can't deny laughter. When it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants. - Stephen King

Anything which is physically possible can always be made financially possible; money is a bugaboo of small minds. - Robert A. Heinlein

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. - Groucho Marx

A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history. - Mahatma Gandhi

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear. - J.B. Morton

He either fears his fate too much,
Or his deserts are small,
Who dares not put it to the touch
To gain or lose it all - Marquis of Montrose

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need. - Tom Robbins

Yoga is possible for anybody who really wants it. Yoga is universal... But don't approach yoga with a business mind looking for worldly gain. - Pattabhi Jois


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