False Dreams

Dentist Office: A filling station - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The tongue is ever turning to the aching tooth. - Thomas Fuller

We break bones and we lose teeth. We play rugby. - Martin Johnson

My friend has false teeth - with braces on them. - Steven Wright

Most every dental school has discount dental services. - Matthew Lesko

Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth. - William R. Alger

Conflict Of Interest: A dental school with a hockey team - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He lied through his teeth and even his teeth were false. - Phil Callaway

Jockey: What a dentist uses when you won't open your mouth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes

A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth. - George D. Prentice

Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown

The man with a toothache thinks everyone happy whose teeth are sound. - George Bernard Shaw

Now Bart, since you broke Grandpa's teeth, he gets to break yours. - Homer Simpson

If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him. - Martin H. Fischer

You don't have to brush your teeth - just the ones you want to keep. - Unknown

You know you're getting old if you have more fingers than real teeth. - Rodney Dangerfield

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield

Once the toothpaste is out of the tube, it is awfully hard to get it back in. - H.R. Haldeman

I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence

The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew. - Herb Caen

Thrusting my nose firmly between his teeth, I threw him heavily to the ground on top of me. - Mark Twain

A physician buries his mistakes, a dentist pulls them out, but a teacher has to live with them. - Unknown

Hockey players wear numbers because you can't always identify the body with dental records. - Unknown

Some tortures are physical
And some are mental,
But the one that is both
is dental. - Ogden Nash

It is guaranteed to put all teeth on edge, including George Washington's, wherever they might be. - Vincent Canby

You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. - Walt Disney

Most men would rather have their bellies opened for five hundred dollars than have a tooth pulled for five. - Martin H. Fischer

Sometimes a man just can't satisfy all of a woman's desires. Which is why God invented dental floss. - Unknown

Many of us are at the 'metallic' age - gold in our teeth, silver in our hair, and lead in our pants. - Unknown

I don't get off on romantic parts. But I often think if I had had my dental work done early on, well, maybe. - Morgan Freeman

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? - Frank Colby

Nothing soothes me more after a long and maddening course of pianoforte recitals than to sit and have my teeth drilled. - George Bernard Shaw

To the person with a toothache, even if the world is tottering, there is nothing more important than a visit to a dentist. - George Bernard Shaw

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

Sometimes, giving up your privacy is a little like going to the dentist and we have let him have access that no one's ever had. - Tom Petty

How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton

Zipper: Two rows of unsmiling teeth that often induce laughter in others, especially when inadvertently left open following a trip to the john - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am keeping with tradition today. After I learned of my Golden Globe nomination, I went to the dentist, so today, let's make it the orthodontist. - Frankie Muniz