Dunking Straw

The piano has been drinking, not me. - Tom Waits

Come quickly, I am drinking the stars. - Dom Perignon

A drowning man will clutch at a straw. - Sir Thomas More

My drinking team has a sailing problem. - Unknown

Work is the curse of the drinking class. - Oscar Wilde

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. - Douglas Adams

Inflation: everyone's illusion of wealth - Unknown

Noise creates illusions. Silence brings truth. - Maxime Lagace

I'd stop drinking but I'm not a quitter. - Unknown

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu

What a strange illusion to suppose that beauty is goodness. - Leo Tolstoy

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. - Henny Youngman

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

Of all vices, drinking is the most incompatible with greatness. - Sir Walter Scott

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

Some of my best friends are illusions. Been sustaining me for years. - Sheila Ballantyne

Our separation from each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. - Albert Einstein

Never say never because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion. - Michael Jordan

A man loses his illusions first, his teeth second, and his follies last. - Helen Rowland

I don't have a drinking problem. Except when I can't get a drink. - Tom Waits

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

Drinking gives one a very clear sense of who's to blame for everything. - Unknown

Like the cosmetics industry, the securities business is engaged in selling illusion. - Paul Samuelson

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Wishes and fears are illusions, Dil Bahadur, not realities. You must practice detachment. - Isabel Allende

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist but you have ceased to live. - Mark Twain

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their illusions destroyed. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Dreams or illusions, call them what you will, they lift us from the commonplace of life to better things. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached. - Simone Weil

If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer. - Clement Freud

Some lawyers are like unto the camel, which, before drinking out of a brook, maketh the water turbid with his foot. - Adolphus W Ward

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

We would rather be ruined than changed. We would rather die in our dread than climb the cross of the moment and let our illusions die. - W H Auden

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield