Dog Days of Summer

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

Volcanoes erupting hot guava - Archie Bunker

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

Are my hot flashes causing Global Warming? - Unknown

I'm still hot - it just comes in flashes. - Unknown

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

We're gonna strike before the Ivan gets hot. - Archie Bunker

Hot flushes and mentalpause. House of ill refute. - Archie Bunker

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

I never feel so much myself as when I'm in a hot bath. - Sylvia Plath

My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes. - Robin Williams

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

It was so hot today I saw a robin dipping his worm in Nestea. - Johnny Carson

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Amazing women don't have hot flashes. We have power surges. - Unknown

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

No good work is ever done while the heart is hot and anxious and fretted. - Olive Schreiner

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

Where beams of imagination play,
The memory's soft figures melt away. - Alexander Pope

Hot lead can be almost as effective coming from a linotype as from a firearm. - John O'Hara

The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. - Alphonse de Lamartine

When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the ice box. - Marilyn Monroe

A dog is the only thing on this earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings

Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

I can see you in the kitchen bending over a hot stove, and I can't see the stove. - Groucho Marx

Real love is a humble receptivity of a silent heart that is prepared to melt and merge. - Banani Ray

I just want a hot cup of coffee, black, and I don't want to hear about your troubles. - Charles Bukowski

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Keep your eye out for hot topics and trends. The media is constantly looking for timely stories. - Jim Kukral

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

Yet, taught by time, my heart has learned to glow for other's good, and melt at other's woe. - Homer

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, 'if you want it your way, cook it yourself.' - Johnny Carson

In the words of Harry S. Truman, "If it's too hot in the kitchen, stay away from the cook." - Archie Bunker

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

A smile is the lightning system of the face, the cooling system of the head, and the heating system of the heart. - Unknown

Always serve too much hot fudge sauce on hot fudge sundaes. It makes people overjoyed, and puts them in your debt. - Judith Olney

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Unknown

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash