Dog Days of Summer

Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

How much is that doggie in the window? - Bob Merrill

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown

The more I see of men, the more I like dogs. - Madame de Stael

I'm still hot - it just comes in flashes. - Unknown

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

We're gonna strike before the Ivan gets hot. - Archie Bunker

Hot flushes and mentalpause. House of ill refute. - Archie Bunker

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten

Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad. - WC Fields

Oh, that sound? I'm in the hot tub, reading a novel. - Jane Smiley

My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes. - Robin Williams

It was so hot today I saw a robin dipping his worm in Nestea. - Johnny Carson

Canada has never been a melting pot; more like a tossed salad. - Arnold Edinborough

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking. - William B. Sprague

It was so hot today I saw a pigeon walking in the shadow of Orson Welles. - Johnny Carson

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Where beams of imagination play,
The memory's soft figures melt away. - Alexander Pope

Chocolate makes otherwise normal people melt into strange states of ecstasy. - John West

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. - Alphonse de Lamartine

When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the ice box. - Marilyn Monroe

Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

I can see you in the kitchen bending over a hot stove, and I can't see the stove. - Groucho Marx

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

There must be quite a few things a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. - Sylvia Plath

Keep your eye out for hot topics and trends. The media is constantly looking for timely stories. - Jim Kukral

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

He is not an honest man who has burned his tongue and does not tell the company that the soup is hot. - Yugoslav Proverb

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, 'if you want it your way, cook it yourself.' - Johnny Carson

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

In the words of Harry S. Truman, "If it's too hot in the kitchen, stay away from the cook." - Archie Bunker

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

Always serve too much hot fudge sauce on hot fudge sundaes. It makes people overjoyed, and puts them in your debt. - Judith Olney

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Unknown

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

As a rule man is a fool,
When it's hot he wants it cool,
When it's cool he wants it hot,
Always wanting what is not. - Unknown

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia