#1 humor site on the 'net

Dead Poirot

That Poirot's not dead!

Dead Poirot thanks to Mel Hardman

Retake of Monty Python's 'Dead Parrot' Sketch

QuotaBills
A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb

The early bird catches the worm. - English Proverb

Birds of a feather flock together. - English Proverb

The freedom of birds is an insult to me. - Cormac McCarthy

Jazz is not dead... it just smells funny. - Frank Zappa

The littlest birds sing the prettiest songs. - Tanyas

Heavenly bodies are nests of invisible birds. - Dejan Stojanovic

The shell must break before the bird can fly. - Unknown

The bird a nest, the spider a web, man friendship. - William Blake

Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings. - Salvador Dali

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine

The bird who dares to fall is the bird who learns to fly. - Unknown

The bird is powered by its own life and by its motivation. - Abdul Kalam

The early bird catches the worm, eats more, and dies sooner. - Czech Proverb

She is not refined. She is not unrefined. She keeps a parrot. - Mark Twain

Egg: 1. A day's work for a hen; 2. A bird's hometown. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If one cannot catch the bird of paradise, better take a wet hen. - Nikita Krushchev

A bird in the hand is a certainty, but a bird in the bush may sing. - Bret Harte

Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark. - Rabindranath Tagore

The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp. - John Berry

In order to see birds it is necessary to become a part of the silence. - Robert Lynd

Though what bird in the best of circumstances does not look a little stricken? - Lorrie Moore

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it. - Steven Wright

The structure of a play is always the story of how the birds come home to roost. - Arthur Miller

I know of only one bird (the parrot) that talks; and it can't fly very high. - Wilbur Wright

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song. - Lou Holtz

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up. - Muhammad Ali

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House. - Robin Williams

Be grateful for luck. Pay the thunder no mind. Listen to the birds. And don't hate nobody. - Eubie Blake

Love is not only the story of butterflies or birds; it is also the story of jackals and hounds. - M.F. Moonzajer

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance. - e e cummings

Just as the bird sings or the butterfly soars, because it is his natural characteristic, so the artist works. - Alma Gluck

Use what talents you possess; the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best. - Henry Van Dyke

One reason why birds and horses are not unhappy is because they are not trying to impress other birds and horses. - Dale Carnegie

Success is full of promise till a man gets it; and then it is a last year's nest from which the birds have flown. - Henry Ward Beecher

The English eat all sorts of birds - pigeons, ducks, sparrows - but if you tell them you eat puffin, you might as well come from Mars. - Bjork

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan

There is nothing in which the birds differ more from man than the way in which they can build and yet leave a landscape as it was before. - Robert Lynd

Be like the bird that, passing on her flight awhile on boughs too slight, feels them give way beneath her, and yet sings, knowing that she hath wings. - Victor Hugo


Locks Of Love

Redneck Speed Bump

Save A Tree

Baby Papaya Crossing

So You Want A Day Off

Mexico Will Pay For The Wall

Behind Every Man

Truck Driver Birth

Motion Picture Selfie

FearBusters

Holy Day Inn

Fat Friend Prayer

Weather Rock - For Accurate Forecasts

Moses Parting the Ice Field

Nutella Face Lotion

Men in Denim

I Have No Time For Your Kisses, Woman

Here We Goat Again

WatchCat

Disk Drive

Unemployed Politicians

Aye Matey

Redneck Calculator

Pocket Knots