David's Return To Italy

Zombies hate fast food. - Unknown

Italy is a geographical expression. - Prince Metternich

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands. - Unknown

My diet is like Atkins, but with the carbs. - BJ Penn

BANG - A four-letter Italian word for good-bye. - Archie Bunker

Imported from a little town in Italy... Fresno. - Archie Bunker

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet. - Unknown

The Creator made Italy from designs by Michelangelo. - Mark Twain

A balanced diet is a Cracker Jack cookie in each hand. - Joe-kster

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

The cardiologist's diet: - If it tastes good, spit it out. - Unknown

What sculpture is to a block of marble, education is to the soul. - Joseph Addison

I don't diet, I just don't eat as much as I'd like to. - Linda Evangelista

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness. - Mark Twain

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis

That's how ya got your Chinatown, your Harlems, your Little Italy... all them grettos. - Archie Bunker

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it. - Jackie Gleason

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

Italy, and the spring and first love all together should suffice to make the gloomiest person happy. - Bertrand Russell

I'm Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I'm Italian on Columbus Day. I'm a New Yorker every day. - Tamara Tunie

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

A dark-chocolate truffle melts in my mouth, and I forget about everything else... even the fact that I'm on a diet. - Barbara Brooke

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

Mexican, Mediterranean, Italian, sushi, I love it all. Put it on a plate, and as long as I know what it is, I will eat it. - Camren Bicondova

You know that ISIS wants to go in and take over the Vatican? You have heard that. You know, that's a dream of theirs, to go into Italy. - Donald Trump

Don't listen to those who say you're taking too big a chance. If no one ever took risks, Michelangelo would have painted the Sistine floor. - Neil Simon