#1 humor site on the 'net

Cornrow Politics

Why they used to call him Senator Braiden

Cornrow Politics thanks to Diane Baugh

QuotaBills
All politics is local. - Thomas P O'Neil

Diplomacy: Lying in state. - Oliver Herford

Politics is an inexact science. - Otto von Bismarck

The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley

A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying

Politics is the art of controlling your environment. - Hunter S. Thompson

I'm not a politician. I've only got one face. - Brendan Behan

All diplomacy is a continuation of war by other means. - Zhou Enlai

The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia. - Otto von Bismarck

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote. - George Jean Nathan

Honor is not the exclusive property of any political party. - Herbert Hoover

Democracy becomes a government of bullies tempered by editors. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain

It's a terrible shame that politics has become show business. - Sydney Pollack

In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant. - Charles de Gaulle

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. - Will Rogers

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought. - Simon Cameron

Ultimatum: In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Politics is a profession where the paths of glory lead but to the gravy. - Billy Boy Franklin

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small. - Henry Kissinger

In politics, madame, you need two things: friends, but above all an enemy. - Brian Mulroney

To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government. - Mark Twain

The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office. - Will Rogers

The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government. - P Chidambaram

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

A filmmaker we almost lost to politics... my friend and colleague, Warren Beatty. - Jack Nicholson

A good politician, under democracy, is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar. - H L Mencken

Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

Personally, I'm against political jokes. Too often they get elected to office. - Henny Youngman

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins

A leader in the Democratic Party is a boss, in the Republican Party he is a leader. - Harry S Truman

The secret of political bargaining is to look more strong than what you really are. - Subhash Bose

Political success is the ability, when the inevitable occurs, to get credit for it. - Laurence J Peter

I learned a long time ago in Hollywood that the only person I should vote for is myself. - Jack Nicholson

The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter. - Winston Churchill

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost

Officialese: A government language where you can understand the words, but not the sentences - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself. - Mark Twain

What is the first part of politics? Education. The second? Education. And the third? Education. - Jules Michelet

In Pierre Elliott Trudeau, Canada has at last produced a political leader worthy of assassination. - Irving Layton

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. - Will Rogers

The irony of the matter is that the future generations do not have a vote. In effect, we hold their proxy. - Charles J Hitch

I don't mind what Congress does, as long as they don't do it in the streets and frighten the horses. - Victor Hugo

One of the key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace, good people don't go into government. - Donald Trump

Relying on the government to protect your privacy is like asking a peeping tom to install your window blinds. - John P Barlow

They say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men. - Clare Boothe Luce

I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I would gladly eat a network executive or a politician. - Marty Feldman

One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. - Plato

At present, our country needs women's idealism and determination, perhaps more in politics than anywhere else. - Shirley Chisholm

Harold MacMillan is a very intelligent man, who, as so often happens in politics, achieved supreme power too late. - Malcolm Muggeridge

He is one of those wise philanthropists who, in a time of famine, would vote for nothing but a supply of toothpicks. - Douglas Jerrold

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce

The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan

Every country must be absolutely free to adopt the type of economic, political and social system that it considers convenient. - Fidel Castro

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

In Mexico, an air-conditioner is called a "politician" because it makes a lot of noise but doesn't work very well. - Len Deighton

I am quite sure now that often in matters concerning religion and politics, a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkeys. - Mark Twain

Our future cannot depend on the government alone. The ultimate solutions lie in the attitudes and the actions of the American people. - Joe Biden

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers

Ever occur to you why some of us can be this much concerned with animals suffering? Because government is not. Why not? Animals don't vote. - Paul Harvey

In politics, as in womanizing, failure is decisive. It sheds its retrospective gloom on earlier endeavor which at the time seemed full of promise. - Malcolm Muggeridge

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock


Worn Brakes

Apprentice Auto Body Shop

Moving Level Pro

Redneck Muffler Repair

Eggsellent Bike

Prairie Bear

Clinton Greeting

Halloween Flashers

Saying Pun

Redneck Blinds

Kid Disposal

Motorvation

Electric Football

Montgomery Ward 1934 Christmas Catalog

Halloween Lamp

Making Music Together

Back Asswards

Tent Peg Setup

Fang Treats

Model T Snowmobile

Skinny Puddy Tat

Redneck Cocktail

Drug Dog Search

Vice Grip Handles