Joe-ks.com
#1 humor site on the 'net
Butt Lift
Update on my surgery
Most of you know I went in for a small surgical procedure for a butt lift. I did not have the most pleasant of experiences. I wanted to show you how it turned out. Please, refrain from getting this procedure - you will regret it!
Much Love, Fermela
Much Love, Fermela
Quack: A duck's Doctor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Clinic: House of pill repute. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore
My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale
A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets
Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier
I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett
Operation: A surgical job taking minutes to do and years to describe - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown
You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb
When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton
Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
I've just become a pensioner so I've started saving up for my own hospital trolley. - Tom Baker
A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown
You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown
The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer
The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull
Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular. - Jay Leno
When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield
A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer
There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman
Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Clinic: House of pill repute. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore
My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale
A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets
Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier
I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. - Winston Bennett
Operation: A surgical job taking minutes to do and years to describe - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown
You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb
When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton
Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
I've just become a pensioner so I've started saving up for my own hospital trolley. - Tom Baker
A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown
You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown
The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer
The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull
Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular. - Jay Leno
When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield
A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer
There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman
Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
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