Billionaire Thoughts

Marry money. - Max Shulman

A fool and his money are soon parted. - English Proverb

A father is a banker provided by nature. - French Proverb

Stick it all right into that bank suppository. - Archie Bunker

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money. - WC Fields

All money is tainted, tain't none of it mine. - Thomas F. McGuire

Emotions are your worst enemy in the stock market. - Don Hays

Stop chasing the money and start chasing the passion. - Tony Hsieh

I can't afford to die - I'd lose too much money. - George Burns

Print some money and give it to us for the rain forests. - Vivienne Westwood

Being rich is having money, being wealthy is having time. - Stephen Swid

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money. - Bob Hope

I don't like money, actually, but it quiets my nerves. - Joe Louis

How much pain have cost us the evils that have never happened. - Thomas Jefferson

A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart. - Jonathan Swift

A woman will buy anything she thinks the store is losing money on. - Kin Hubbard

An education obtained with money is worse than no education at all. - Socrates

Being rich is better than being poor, if only for financial reasons. - Woody Allen

Who recalls when folks got along without something if it cost too much? - Kin Hubbard

The more money an American accumulates, the less interesting he becomes. - Gore Vidal

There should be no bank too big to fail but no individual too big to jail. - Hillary Clinton

Will you marry me? Do you have any money?
Answer the second question first. - Groucho Marx

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to. - Dorothy Parker

Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money. - Jackie Mason

They say love is more important than money. Have you tried paying your bills with a hug? - Dave Chapelle

I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it. - Dorothy Parker

It would be nice if the poor were to get even half of the money that is spent in studying them. - Bill Vaughan

Most people work just hard enough not to get fired, and get paid just enough money not to quite. - George Carlin

Beware of those who would pay you lip service but refuse to put their money where their mouths are. - Faydra D. Fields

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

Why does not the Pope build St. Peter's with his own money, rather than with the money of poor believers? - Martin Luther

Keeping books on social aid is capitalistic nonsense. I just use the money for the poor. I can't stop to count it. - Evita Peron

I tell ya, my wife and I, we don't think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless. - Rodney Dangerfield

Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like. - Will Smith

Money isn't the most important thing in life, but it's reasonably close to oxygen on the "gotta have it" scale. - Zig Ziglar

Street League Skateboarding is the premier professional skateboarding league in the world, with the biggest prize money in history. - Rob Dyrdek

The politicians in Washington are spending trillions of dollars of our money. When are Americans going to stand up and say enough is enough? - Joe Wurzelbacher

The cost of oblivious daydreaming was always this moment of return, the realignment with what had been before and now seemed a little worse. - Ian McEwan

A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm. - Bill Vaughan