Unwanted Christmas Gifts

Life itself is a gift. - Daphne R Kingma

Shopping is my cardio. - Carrie Bradshaw

What is bought is cheaper than a gift. - Portuguese Proverb

Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. - Suzanne Somers

Gladly accept the gifts of the present hour. - Horace

Every good and perfect gift comes from above. - Bible

Inequality of knowledge is the key to a sale. - Neil O Gustafson

Every problem has a gift for you in its hands. - Richard Bach

There is no more expensive thing than a free gift. - Michel de Montaigne

Leanardo De Cappuccino: Founder, coffee shop chain - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Praise is the only gift for which people are really grateful. - Marguerite

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf

Traditional methods of sales prospecting are grossly inefficient. - Jill Konrath

I spent seven hours in a beauty shop... and that was for the estimate. - Phyllis Diller

The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work. - Emile Zola

Someone told me that each equation I included in the book would halve the sales. - Stephen Hawking

I'm so ugly I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get. - Rodney Dangerfield

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

My legs are so sore from the gym that I almost couldn't walk to the donut shop. - Bill Murray

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time. - Rick Warren

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

Restitution: The founding or endowing of universities and public libraries by gift or bequest. - Ambrose Bierce

I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

Cease to inquire what the future has in store, and to take as a gift whatever the day brings forth. - Horace

To me, job titles don't matter. Everyone is in sales. It's the only way we stay in business. - Harvey Mackay

I remember when the candle shop burned won. Everyone stood around singing "Happy Birthday." - Steven Wright

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present. - Bil Keane

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

Forgiveness is a gift to yourself - have the compassion to forgive others, and the courage to forgive yourself. - Mary Anne Radmacher

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is God's Gift. That's why we call it the 'Present.' - Bill Keane

The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other. - Johnny Carson

The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo

Remembering is a gift - a silent gift, because it roots us in reality while at the same time pointing us towards eternity. - Raphael Anzenberger

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

I hate smart sales clerks. I said to one, "What do you have in lingerie?" She says, "More than you'll ever have!" - Phyllis Diller

Every essential oil has a healing purpose. I think it's a great gift because it's something that elevates your mood and your health. - Yolanda Hadid