Joe-ks.com
#1 humor site on the 'net
Turkey Recipe
Here's a recipe I thought you would like for the holidays
Ingredients:
1 whole turkey
1 large lemon, cut into halves
Salt and pepper to taste; butter or olive oil, whichever you prefer
Heat oven to 350 degrees
Rub butter or oil over the skin of the turkey until it is completely coated. Sprinkle with salt, pepper and any other seasonings you prefer.
Take a knife and gently separate the skin from the breast meat. Slide lemon halves under the skin with the peel side up, one on each side, this way the juice from the lemon will release into the breasts.
Cover and bake for 30-45 minutes. Remove cover and continue to roast until juices run clear, basting every 15-20 minutes.
If you’ve followed these steps correctly, your turkey should look like the one in the picture below. Bon Appetit!
1 whole turkey
1 large lemon, cut into halves
Salt and pepper to taste; butter or olive oil, whichever you prefer
Heat oven to 350 degrees
Rub butter or oil over the skin of the turkey until it is completely coated. Sprinkle with salt, pepper and any other seasonings you prefer.
Take a knife and gently separate the skin from the breast meat. Slide lemon halves under the skin with the peel side up, one on each side, this way the juice from the lemon will release into the breasts.
Cover and bake for 30-45 minutes. Remove cover and continue to roast until juices run clear, basting every 15-20 minutes.
If you’ve followed these steps correctly, your turkey should look like the one in the picture below. Bon Appetit!
Be careful not to overcook it though, or you’ll end up with this...
Lighten up the mood at your Thanksgiving meal
Eternity is two people and a roast turkey. - James Dent
Here he comes, swelling like a turkey-cock. - William Shakespeare
A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown
No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks. - St. Ambrose
Envy and greed starve on a healthy diet of thanksgiving. - Billy Graham
A peacock that rests on his feathers is just another turkey. - Dolly Parton
For all that has been - thanks.
For all that will be - yes. - Dag Hammarskjold
I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator. - Emo Philips
We take for granted the things that we should be giving thanks for. - Unknown
Thanksgiving, to be truly Thanksgiving, is first thanks, then giving. - Jacob Braude
Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander
Thanks to this man I've gone from over-the-counter to over-the-barrel. - Unknown
Wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving. - Unknown
The turkey is living proof that an animal can survive with no intelligence at all. - Harvey D. Comstock
My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller
Thanksgiving is the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty. - Michael Dresser
Stuff: What people do on Thanksgiving: First to the turkey, and then to themselves - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Go see that turkey for yourself, and see for yourself why you shouldn't see it. - Samuel Goldwyn
A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen. - Kin Hubbard
Thanks you for being a part of my life, whether you were a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime. - Unknown
I love Thanksgiving turkey - it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts. - Arnold Schwarzenegger
My mother gave me my drive, but my father gave me my dreams. Thanks to him, I could see a future. - Liza Minnelli
Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. - W.T. Purkiser
We would worry less if we praised more. Thanksgiving is the enemy of discontent and dissatisfaction. - Harry Ironside
Your majesty, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, and Madame Houde thanks you from her bottom too. - Camillein Houde
Thanksgiving is the language of heaven, and we had better start to learn it if we are not to be mere dumb aliens there. - AJ Gossip
I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson
Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. - I Thessalonians 5:16-18
We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing. - George Carlin
Got no checkbooks, got no banks,
Still I'd like to express my thanks -
I got the sun in the mornin'
And the moon at night. - Irving Berlin
Sometimes our light goes out but is blown into flame by another human being. Each of us owes deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this light. - Albert Schweitzer
Here he comes, swelling like a turkey-cock. - William Shakespeare
A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown
No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks. - St. Ambrose
Envy and greed starve on a healthy diet of thanksgiving. - Billy Graham
A peacock that rests on his feathers is just another turkey. - Dolly Parton
For all that has been - thanks.
For all that will be - yes. - Dag Hammarskjold
I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator. - Emo Philips
We take for granted the things that we should be giving thanks for. - Unknown
Thanksgiving, to be truly Thanksgiving, is first thanks, then giving. - Jacob Braude
Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander
Thanks to this man I've gone from over-the-counter to over-the-barrel. - Unknown
Wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving. - Unknown
The turkey is living proof that an animal can survive with no intelligence at all. - Harvey D. Comstock
My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller
Thanksgiving is the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty. - Michael Dresser
Stuff: What people do on Thanksgiving: First to the turkey, and then to themselves - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Go see that turkey for yourself, and see for yourself why you shouldn't see it. - Samuel Goldwyn
A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen. - Kin Hubbard
Thanks you for being a part of my life, whether you were a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime. - Unknown
I love Thanksgiving turkey - it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts. - Arnold Schwarzenegger
My mother gave me my drive, but my father gave me my dreams. Thanks to him, I could see a future. - Liza Minnelli
Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. - W.T. Purkiser
We would worry less if we praised more. Thanksgiving is the enemy of discontent and dissatisfaction. - Harry Ironside
Your majesty, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, and Madame Houde thanks you from her bottom too. - Camillein Houde
Thanksgiving is the language of heaven, and we had better start to learn it if we are not to be mere dumb aliens there. - AJ Gossip
I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson
Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. - I Thessalonians 5:16-18
We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing. - George Carlin
Got no checkbooks, got no banks,
Still I'd like to express my thanks -
I got the sun in the mornin'
And the moon at night. - Irving Berlin
Sometimes our light goes out but is blown into flame by another human being. Each of us owes deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this light. - Albert Schweitzer
Chinese Puzzle Car
Always Give 100% At Work
Ancient Politician
My Toaster Is Broken
Shining Stars
Tunnel Face
The Bugs Are Bad This Year
Dog Spa
Ostrich Imprint
Local Crabs
World's First Hard Hat
Bird Melons
Bag Hang-Up
LippoPotumus
Haircut For Staff Meetings
Wolf Mode
Undertaker Bike
Throwaway Sport Paper
Pacman Skeleton
Vatican City's New Breakfast Special
Flying Cathedral Excuse
Day At The Beach
John The Baptist Souvenirs
Amish Prom Limo