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They Found Your Balls

Why you shouldn't go into the weeds looking for your golf ball

They Found Your Balls thanks to Barry McCartney

They Found Your Balls thanks to Barry McCartney

They Found Your Balls thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Golf is a good walk spoiled. - Mark Twain

Even snakes are afraid of snakes. - Steven Wright

Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player

The gods play games with men as balls. - Titus Maccius Plautus

When I die, bury my balls next to my old bag. - Unknown

Golf is an easy game, it's just hard to play. - Unknown

It's hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut. - Robin Williams

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. - Paul Gallico

Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown

If it weren't for golf, I'd probably be a caddie today. - George Archer

Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. - Billy Graham

If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake. - Bern Williams

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

They call it golf because all of the other four-letter names were taken. - Ray Floyd

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. - Gerald R. Ford

One advantage of golf over bowling is that you never lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter

If you see a snake, just kill it - don't appoint a committee on snakes. - H. Ross Perot

Show me a good loser and I'll show you a man playing golf with his boss. - Unknown

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. - Mark Twain

I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser. - Arnold Palmer

I had to have some balls to be Irish Catholic in South London. Most of that time I spent fighting. - Pierce Brosnan

I played golf. I didn't get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying. - Mitch Hedberg

Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The reason your golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can't see him laughing. - Phyllis Diller

The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf. - Bertrand Russell

Golf is like any other sports competition. There is not a whole lot of point to it unless someone suffers. - Kevin Wohl

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. - Ernest Hemingway

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt

Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. - Arthur Daley

The rules of clockwork might apply to familiar objects such as snooker balls, but when it comes to atoms, the rules are those of roulette. - Paul Davies

If Obama resigns from office NOW, thereby doing a great service to the country, I will give him free lifetime golf at any one of my courses. - Donald Trump

I don't know him very well... I've played him at golf and beat him badly both times, and I think that probably had a negative impact on him. - Donald Trump


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