Redneck Water Heater

There's no place like home. - The Wizard of Oz

Art is a house that tries to be haunted. - Emily Dickinson

Heaven is home. Utopia is here. Nirvana is now. - Edward Abbey

Pedestrian: a man whose son is home from college. - Unknown

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance? - Phyllis Diller

There is nothing like staying at home for real comfort. - Jane Austen

Stucco: What a lot of house hunters are getting these days - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I can't clean house and save the world at the same time. - Unknown

I think housework is the reason most women go to the office. - Heloise Cruse

My barn having burned to the ground, I can now see the moon. - Christina Frederick

God made rainy days so gardeners could get the housework done. - Unknown

One road leads home and a thousand roads lead into the wilderness. - C S Lewis

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home. - Robert Orben

Where we love is home - home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

A bright person can always think of something better to do than housework. - Ruby Lou Barnhill

I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don't know how I got there. - Steven Wright

People who have good relationships at home are more effective in the marketplace. - Zig Ziglar

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar. - WC Fields

This stammer got me a home in Beverly Hills, and I'm not about to screw with it now. - Bob Newhart

God gives men wisdom as he gives them gold; his treasure house is not the mint, but the mine. - Arabic Proverb

If we build in the desert, let the house know the desert and the desert be proud of the house. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Said the daughter: "I don't have to help my Mom with the housework. She knows how." - Unknown

Liberate yourself today. At work or at home - you don't have to be how others expect you to be. - Elaine Harrison

The ache for home lives in all of us. The safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned. - Maya Angelou

My husband is so good at home repairs that they have a special VIP area for him in the emergency room. - Unknown

Gonna be incrimated... they're gonna keep the ashes around the house in one of them silver urinals. - Archie Bunker

Lawyers are like painters - once they get into a house, you never know when you will get rid of them again. - Peter A Graham

I don't want to end up in an old folks' home wearing incompetence pads. I'm still compost mentis. - Harriet Wynn

I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. - Joan Rivers

I could dance with you till the cows come home...
on second thought, I'll dance with the cows till you come home. - Groucho Marx

My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH. - Steven Wright

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. - Ogden Nash

The most dangerous person of the world is a member of the United States Congress just home from a three-day fact-finding trip. - Johnny Isakson

Camping is not a date; it's an endurance test. If you can survive camping with someone, you should marry them on the way home. - Yvonne Prinz

Returning home is the most difficult part of long-distance hiking. You have grown outside the puzzle and your piece no longer fits. - Cindy Ross

Talking is a hydrant in the yard and writing is a faucet upstairs in the house. Opening the first takes the pressure off the second. - Robert Frost

Home is a name, a word, it is a strong one; stronger than magician ever spoke, or spirit ever answers to, in the strongest conjuration. - Charles Dickens

At fifty, the madwoman in the attic breaks loose, stomps down the stairs, and sets fire to the house. She won't be imprisoned anymore. - Erica Jong

Science is built of facts the way a house is built of bricks; but an accumulation of facts is no more science than a pile of bricks is a house. - Henri Poincare