Pa Loves Women

Gags die, humor doesn't. - Jack Benny

Leave the dead moments to bury the dead. - E R Bulwer-Lytton

Women would rather be right than reasonable. - Ogden Nash

When I die, bury my balls next to my old bag. - Unknown

To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die. - Clyde Campbell

Life and joy and beauty are better than dusty death. - Bertrand Russell

Music, when soft voices die, vibrates in the memory. - Percy Bysshe Shelley

Often the test of courage is not to die, but to live. - Conte Vittorio Afieri

Death is very often referred to as a good career move. - Buddy Holly

When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction. - Steven Wright

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you. - Elbert Hubbard

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

The tragedy of Mormonism is, a single death makes a dozen widows. - American Saying

Tigers die and leave their skins; people die and leave their names. - Japanese Proverb

Death is nature's way of saying, "Your table is ready." - Robin Williams

The past attracts me, the present frightens me, because the future is death. - Guy de Maupassant

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

Here's to strong women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them. - Unknown

You need to bury the hatchet. No need to hold grudges. That only weighs you down. - Ken Shamrock

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it. - P.J. O'Rourke

Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valiant never taste of death but once. - William Shakespeare

There are some days when I think I'm going to die from an overdose of satisfaction. - Salvador Dali

Women have a hard enough time in this world; telling them the truth would be too cruel. - H L Mencken

The Irish don't know what they want and are prepared to fight to the death to get it. - Sidney Littlewood

Each night, when I go to sleep, I die. And the next morning, when I wake up, I am reborn. - Mahatma Gandhi

Funeral: A pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker. - Ambrose Bierce

Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance. - Oscar Wilde

We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us. - Charles Bukowski

Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes. - Oscar Wilde

Hearts can break. Sometimes I think it would be better if we died when they did, but we don't. - Stephen King

Beauty Parlor: 1. A place where women curl up and dye; 2. A place where everybody knows your MANE. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you wait for perfect conditions to seize an opportunity, you'll be waiting till the day you die. - Mark Batterson

God loves us too much to leave us alone to contend with the pain, guilt and loneliness of our present life. - Josh McDowell

Live with fulfillment, serve with passion so in this lifetime you will have the abillity to die with no regrets. - Randy Gonzales

The fence around a cemetery is foolish, for those inside can't come out and those outside don't want to get it. - Arthur Brisbane

If you make every game a life-and-death proposition, you're going to have problems. For one thing, you'll be dead a lot. - Dean Smith

If you think that praise is due, now's the time to show it, 'cause a man can't read his tombstone when he's dead. - Unknown

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer. Before your face questions die away. What other answer would suffice? - C S Lewis