Designer Dog

France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker

Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

Zit: Command given to a spotted dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

A good bone does not always come to a good dog. - French Proverb

I was the kid next door's imaginary friend. - Emo Philips

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too! - The Wizard of Oz

Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten

Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad. - WC Fields

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon

Jackpot: When all the kids stay at friends' homes for the night - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

I'm like the kid in kindergarten; I really do send valentines to everyone. - Susie Bright

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. - Brian P. Cleary

When I was a kid, I used to think pork chops and karate chops were the same thing. - Shane Koyczan

I can get motivated seeing a kid at my son's school overcome a learning disability. - Jason Alexander

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it. - George Burns

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden

I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school. - Unknown

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash