Designer Dog

Dyspupsia: Being sick as a dog. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The painting has a life of its own. - Jackson Pollock

Do your kids a favor - don't have any. - Robert Orben

Great shot kid, that was one in a million. - Han Solo

Joy Ride: Going somewhere without the kids - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can kid the world, but not your sister. - Charlotte Gray

Pants: Something a dog does and a man steps into - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Raising kids is a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

The only time I feel alive is when I'm painting. - Andy Warhol

Arpeggio: The story book kid with the big nose that grows - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime. - Red Skelton

Colliefornia: The American state that has gone to the dogs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts. - Homer Simpson

Lilac: 'He's a nice kid but he can lilac anything.' - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Teaching kids to count is fine, but teaching them what counts is best. - Bob Talbert

A painting is never finished — it simply stops in interesting places. - Paul Gardner

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. - Brian P. Cleary

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain

A rich person should leave his kids enough to do something, but not enough to do nothing. - Warren Buffett

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

Having a kid is like falling in love for the first time when you're 12, but every single day. - Mike Myers

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

Because there is always some kid who may be seeing me for the first or last time, I owe him my best. - Joe DiMaggio

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Having kids - the responsibility of rearing good, kind, ethical, responsible human beings - is the biggest job anyone can embark on. - Maria Shriver

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com