Bucket Bath

I like children - fried. - WC Fields

Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

Children are the wisdom of the nation. - African Saying

What is a home without children? Quiet. - Henny Youngman

Familiarity breeds contempt - and children. - Mark Twain

It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

For when a child is born the mother also is born again. - Gilbert Parker

Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad. - WC Fields

Children should neither be seen nor heard from - ever again. - WC Fields

Give a little love to a child, and you get a great deal back. - John Ruskin

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child. - Joe Houldsworth

Amateurs wait for inspiration. The real pros get up and go to work. - Harvey Mackay

No matter how bad a child is, he is still good for a tax deduction. - American Proverb

Children see things very well sometimes - and idealists even better. - Lorraine Hansbury

Children find everything in nothing; men find nothing in everything. - Giacomo Leopardi

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio. - Rodney Dangerfield

Creative play is like a spring that bubbles up from deep within a child. - Joan Almon

If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else. - Ann Landers

A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. - Groucho Marx

Enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity. - Bo Bennett

A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty. - Unknown

I refuse to admit that I am more than 52, even if that makes my children illegitimate. - Nancy Astor

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

The cure for a broken heart is simple, my lady. A hot bath and a good night's sleep. - Margaret George

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home. - Phyllis Diller

Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde

The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm. - Aldous Huxley

Play is a vital learning medium for a child. In a sense play is his work. And he discovers knowledge for himself. - Raymond Moore

People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily. - Zig Ziglar

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato

Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken and there's a lot of throwing up. - Ray Romano

Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals. - Robert Orben

Since it is so likely that children will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage. - C S Lewis

I was forced to live far beyond my years when just a child, now I have reversed the order and I intend to remain young indefinitely. - Mary Pickford

I cannot for the life of me understand why small children take so long to grow up. I think they do it deliberately, just to annoy me. - Agatha Trunchbull

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia

Forgiveness is the answer to the child's dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is made clean again. - Dag Hammarskjold

If you never want to see a man again, just tell him, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children." They leave skid marks. - Rita Rudner