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A Mother's Day Special

Don't ignore your gut feelings!

A Mother's Day Special thanks to Kyle Ziegler

California Colon Hydrotherapy - for memorable occasions

QuotaBills
Necessity is the mother of attraction. - Luke McKissack

Fearlessness is the mother of reinvention. - Arianna Huffington

Necessity is the mother of taking chances. - Mark Twain

Inner silence is the mother of all talents. - Ravi Shankar

My mom had a very difficult childhood. My childhood. - Cindy Marzahn

Antibody: 1. Against everyone; 2. Your Uncle's wife. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father. - Greg Norman

My wife was too beautiful for words, but not for arguments. - John Barrymore

A round wife and a full barn are the signs of good success. - Amish Saying

She's descended from a long line her mother listened to. - Gypsy Rose Lee

Mother is the home we come from. She is nature, soil, ocean. - Erich Fromm

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. - Henny Youngman

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. - Sigmund Freud

I unapologetically and unabashedly am deeply biased toward my mother. - Chelsea Clinton

My wife and I are getting remarried. Our divorce didn't work out. - Rodney Dangerfield

Extravagance: Anything you buy that is of no earthly use to your wife - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The secrets of success are a good wife and a steady job. My wife told me. - Howard Nemerov

The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him. - Oscar Wilde

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. - Unknown

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Chutzpapa: A father who wakes his wife at 4 a.m. so she can change the baby's diaper - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

The only place you’re sure to find love is at the end of a letter from your mother. - Bruce Lansky

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

Because: Mom's reason for having kids do things which can't be explained logically - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My wife hasn't had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of our Lord-only-knows. - Unknown

Wise Husband: One who buys his wife such fine china she won't trust him to wash the dishes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend. - Rodney Dangerfield

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes. - Robert Frost

A wise man will never tell his wife to keep quiet. He will tell her she looks beautiful with her mouth closed. - Unknown

I am one of those cliff-hanging Catholics. I don't believe in God, but I do believe that Mary was his mother. - Martin Sheen

Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on a date. - Caroline Rhea

To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow. - Maya Angelou

It takes someone really brave to be a mother, someone strong to raise a child, and someone special to love someone more than herself. - Unknown

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

Secretary: "It must be hard to lose your mother-in-law." WC Fields: "Yes it is, very hard. It's almost impossible." - WC Fields

Education commences on the mother's knee, and every word spoken within hearsay of little children tends toward the formation of character. - Hosea Ballou


Never Run a Red Light

Bee Safe

Hummers Only Look Tough

Tactical Texas

Defence Budget Cuts

Welfare State

No Flies On Me

Stick Family Meal

Wet Floor

Lord Of The Watch

Close Encounters of the Whale Kind

Military Watch Tower

No Go Intersection

Public Transportation In Scotland

Guarded Nights

Financial Meltdown

Fox Kabob

Microwaved Bulb... Watts You Won't See

Saks-e Parking Job

Griller Bees

Texting While Cycling

Redneck Manicure

Police Profiling In Canada

Tree Stand