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Twin Dish

New satellite TV system for pets

Twin Dish thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
TV: Chewing gum for the eyes. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

Dyspupsia: Being sick as a dog. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Subwoofer: A dog who scuba dives - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Cobra: Bra worn by Siamese twins. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Television is democracy at its ugliest. - Paddy Chayefsky

A TV licence is a licence to print money. - Roy Thomson

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Pants: Something a dog does and a man steps into - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ah, TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me! - Homer Simpson

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. - Corey Ford

Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten

No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

Memory is a complicated thing, a relative to truth but not its twin. - Barbara Kingsolver

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we've got television. - Archie Bunker

Television has brought back murder into the home... where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television. - Dave Barry

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

Satellite imagery is the only way we can map the looting patterns effectively. - Sarah Parcak

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

I have had my television aerials removed. It is the moral equivalent of a prostate operation. - Malcolm Muggeridge

President Ford tells us all to bite the bullet and Betsy Ford goes on TV and shoots off her mouth. - Archie Bunker

I chose the Egyptian dream: the dream to make a TV show, and then be called an infidel by the end. - Bassem Youssef

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield

We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight. - Milton Berle

If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

We pick politicians by how they look on TV and Miss America on where she stands on the issues. Isn't that a little backwards? - Jay Leno

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden


In Step Horse

Finger Olympics

Cow Licks

Dog Distress

Mate Attraction

Dark Room

Lineup For Dinner

Redneck Furnace

Traffic Sign Art

A Dog's Worst Nightmare

Garage Door Art

Kellogg's Fire

Teenage Independence

Parasite Trivia

Bobslide Event

Scooter Races

Bull Squirrel

Wife Consumption

Chinese Shoelusion

Craneception

Pizza Math

Cautious Australia

Homer Escalator, Doh!

Cable Routing in Beirut