Road Pirate

When you come to a fork in the road, take it. - Yogi Berra

No one is in your mind - you are its only driver. - Unknown

If you want to get my attention, wear a pirate outfit. - Michelle Branch

The road to the City of Emeralds is paved with yellow brick. - L. Frank Baum

We know the road to freedom has always been stalked by death. - Angela Davis

Destiny is a Paris driver pushing a taxicab with my name on it. - Frank Dane

The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. - Will Rogers

A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it. - Jean de La Fontaine

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

Show me the right path, O Lord; point out the road for me to follow. - Bible

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

My life is full of mistakes. They're like pebbles that make a good road. - Beatrice Wood

God made the world round so we would never be able to see too far down the road. - Unknown

There is more treasure in books than all the pirate's loot on treasure island. - Walt Disney

We're all pilgrims on the same journey, but some pilgrims have better road maps. - Nelson DeMille

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

When I got outta High School I was driving a truck. I was just a poor boy from Memphis. - Elvis Presley

All you need is the plan, the road map, and the courage to press on to your destination. - Earl Nightingale

Your goals are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life. - Les Brown

The church is close, but the road is icey. The tavern is far, but I will walk carefully. - Russian Proverb

Suddenly you're like a pirate, you're 65 years old and you've got an earring. - Fred Willard

There's no road map on how to raise a family: it's always an enormous negotiation. - Meryl Streep

I think every entrepreneur in Canada owes the next generation a road map of how to do it again. - Kevin O'Leary

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

There are only three ages for women in Hollywood: Babe, District Attorney, and Driving Miss Daisy. - Goldie Hawn

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

By its very nature the beautiful is isolated from everything else. From beauty no road leads to reality. - Hannah Arendt

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Officer, I know I was going faster than 55 MPH, but I wasn't going to be on the road an hour." - Steven Wright

Every road you take has a destination. What road are you on and will it take you where you really want to go? - Unknown

All you have to do is look straight and see the road, and when you see it, don't sit looking at it - walk. - Ayn Rand

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

To be idle is a short road to death and to be diligent is a way of life; foolish people are idle, wise people are diligent. - Buddha

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com