Redneck Watch

Time is the wisest counselor. - Pericles

I wasted time, and now doth time waste me. - William Shakespeare

The time is always right to do what is right. - Martin Luther King Jr.

Every time I paint a portrait I lose a friend. - John Singer Sargent

In my mind I'm a blind man doin' time. - Tupac Shakur

Time is a game played beautifully by children. - Heraclitus

Have patience! In time, even grass becomes milk. - Charan Singh

I don't need time. What I need is a deadline. - Duke Ellington

Time is what we want most, but what we use worst. - William Penn

Reputation is for time; character is for eternity. - J.B. Gough

You are now traveling into the paradise of the scholars. - Caspar Wolff

And now to hole eight, which is in fact the eighth hole. - Peter Alliss

I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt. - Groucho Marx

90 percent of my time is spent on 10 percent of the world. - Colin Powell

Dancing is like bank robbery - it takes split second timing. - Twyla Tharp

Success consists of getting up just one more time than you fall. - Oliver Goldsmith

Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later. - Og Mandino

Every time you have to speak, you are auditioning for leadership. - James Humes

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. - Neil Postman

There is time for work. And time for love. That leaves no other time. - Coco Chanel

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

Now Bart, since you broke Grandpa's teeth, he gets to break yours. - Homer Simpson

We laugh, we cry, we make time fly. We are best friends, my mom and I. - Unknown

The pain I feel now is the happiness I had before. That's the deal. - C S Lewis

The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time. - Dean Acheson

All endings are also beginnings - we just don't know it at the time. - Mitch Albom

Whomever you spend time with you become. So spend time with great people. - Nido Qubein

Human beings want to be good, but not too good and not quite all the time. - George Orwell

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a baby. - Natalie Wood

If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over? - John Wooden

I enjoy the spring more than the autumn now. One does, I think, as one gets older. - Virginia Woolf

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter. - Blaise Pascal

All my life I've looked at words as though I were seeing them for the first time. - Ernest Hemingway

Children need the freedom and time to play. Play is not a luxury. Play is a necessity. - Kay R. Jamison

There's flames, now, and the frame is crashing to the ground... oh, the humanity... - Herbert Robertson

Winning is coming in fourth, exhausted but excited because you came in fifth last time. - Denis Waltley

We are about creating a new wave of talent. We are the Manchester United of kitchens now. - Gordon Ramsay

Me and my bed are perfect for each other, but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up. - Unknown

Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got. - Art Buchwald

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

Even a wise man knows doubt from time to time, it is the fool who allows it to rule his judgement. - Jennifer Hudock

Smell is a long-distance sense, a way of stretching time and finding out in advance what lies ahead. - Lyall Watson

Ezra was right half the time, and when he was wrong, he was so wrong you were never in any doubt about it. - Ernest Hemingway

Do not attack me with your watch. A watch is always too fast or too slow. I cannot be dictated to by a watch. - Jane Austen

I love to go to a movie, get a Diet Coke and a barrel of popcorn, and sit there with my kids and watch a film. - William Shatner

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

Even if you don't have time for a big workout, stretching in the morning and night really changes your body. - Erin Heatherton

He is one of those wise philanthropists who, in a time of famine, would vote for nothing but a supply of toothpicks. - Douglas Jerrold

Some say cling to the earth while others say reach for the stars. There's time enough for the earth in the grave. - Unknown

God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die. - Bill Watterson

I don't think that we're meant to understand it all the time. I think that sometimes we just have to have faith. - Nicholas Sparks

I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar. - Robert Brault

In Japan, animation is a big part of your media diet. I moved out to Los Angeles at 9, and when I got homesick, I would watch anime. - Hiro Murai

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

'Till death do us part' doesn't sound so horrible. It only means about 10 or 15 years and not the eternity it used to mean. - Joy Behar

It's life, isn't it? You plow ahead and make a hit. And you plow on and someone passes you. Then someone passes them. Time levels. - Katharine Hepburn

The starting line of the New York Marathon is like a giant time bomb behind you about to go off. It is the most spectacular start in sport. - Bill Rodgers

If Obama resigns from office NOW, thereby doing a great service to the country, I will give him free lifetime golf at any one of my courses. - Donald Trump

The world is very different now, for man holds in his mortal hands the power to abolish all forms of human poverty, and all forms of human life. - John F Kennedy

Deadlines aren't bad. They help you organize your time. They help you set priorities. They make you get going when you might not feel like it. - Harvey Mackay

A gift is pure when it is given from the heart to the right person at the right time and at the right place, and when we expect nothing in return. - Vyasa

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash

Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek. - Barack Obama