Inside A Computer

Defect-free software does not exist. - Wietse Venema

Oh, so they have internet on computers now! - Homer Simpson

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone. - W H Auden

We don't need nukes. We have the internet. - Alice Minium

The internet is a great way to get on the net. - Bob Dole

Real Soon Now: When the software will be shipped - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. - John F Kennedy

Ecrastinate: Checking your e-mail just one more time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet. - Will Ferrell

Iconomic: Making do with fewer icons on your computer desktop - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it. - Henry Thoreau

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben

In software systems it is often the early bird that makes the worm. - Alan Perlis

The Internet treats censorship as a malfunction and routes around it. - John P Barlow

The 3 fastest means of communication: Twitter; Telephone; Tell a woman. - Unknown

Discussion is an exchange of knowledge; argument is an exchange of ignorance. - Robert Quillen

Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant. - Mitchell Kapor

In every encounter we either give life or we drain it; there is no neutral exchange. - Brennan Manning

Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

Just as we could have rode into the sunset, along came the Internet, and it tripled the significance of the PC. - Andy Grove

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

Man is the cheapest 150-pound nonlinear, all-purpose computer system which can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. - NASA

Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett

People enjoy the interaction on the internet, and the feeling of belonging to a group that does something interesting. - Linus Torvalds

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

From sixdegrees to Friendster to Facebook, social networking has become a familiar and ubiquitous part of the Internet. - David Kirkpatrick

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. - Ogden Nash

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

Discussion: 1. A method of confirming others in their errors; 2. An exchange of knowledge (see also Argument - an exchange of ignorance). - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The majority of people who don't have Internet don't have the Internet because they don't know why they want to use the Internet. - Mark Zuckerberg

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber

Cell phones, mobile e-mail, and all the other cool and slick gadgets can cause massive losses in our creative output and overall productivity. - Robin S Sharma

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright

The problem with the internet is that it gives you everything - reliable material and crazy material. So the problem becomes, how do you discriminate? - Umberto Eco