#1 humor site on the 'net

Border Patrol At Its Finest

Rare photo of the U.S. Border Patrol at work

Border Patrol At Its Finest thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

Colliefornia: The American state that has gone to the dogs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no security in this life. There is only opportunity. - Douglas MacAurthur

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

A conquering army on the border will not be stopped by eloquence. - Otto von Bismarck

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

We spend our time searching for security and hate it when we get it. - John Steinbeck

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

Sleeping is my drug; my bed is my dealer; and my alarm clock is the police. - Unknown

He prefers the security of known misery to the misery of unfamiliar insecurity. - Sheldon B. Kopp

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

Security is mostly a superstition. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. - Helen Keller

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. - Unknown

It is true greatness to have in one the frailty of a man and the security of a god. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Real joy seems to me almost as unlike security or prosperity as it is unlike agony. - C S Lewis

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill

A man's own good breeding is the best security against other people's ill manners. - Lord Chesterfield

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

A police force, wherever they are, is made up of amazing people, and I respect them a great deal. - Nancy McKeon

I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy

My parents live in a retirement community, which is basically a minimum-security prison with a golf course. - Joel Warshaw

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is certain dogs I know will go to heaven, and very, very few people. - James Thurber

If you can't even acknowledge that you have to fix social security, that's not a very good starting point. - Rob Portman

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men. - Clement Freud

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


Child's Motorcycle Helmet

Montana Mountain Bike

Sealtastic

Bland Entrance

Cruising Advice

Cat Dugout

Open Drive Through

Secret Revealed

Tired Flagpole

Bent Car Sculpture

Cow Jacket

Thanks For Noticing

Overflow Truck Garden

Beach Sign Training

Encouraging Seal

GMC Pool

Nature Calls

You're Home Early

New Nail Gun

Long Noodles

EMS Upgrade

No Pot Of Gold

Graduation Swag

Monkeypox