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Baby's Off Day

Why does everything always happen to me?

Baby's Off Day thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Nipper: Baby crab - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Newborn Baby: Fresh heir - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Quadruplets: Four crying out loud - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Stoic: De boid what brings de babies - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Give your stress wings and let it fly away. - Gerri Guillemets

Dapper Diaper: Well-dressed baby underwear. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde

Menopause: you have to laugh or you'll end up crying. - Missa Says

I'll cry at the end of the day, not with fresh makeup. - Kim Kardashian

Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned. - WC Fields

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

Reality: The leading cause of stress among those in touch with it. - Lily Tomlin

My Birth Certificate is so old, it's written in Roman Numerals. - Bill Carter

Intellectual growth should commence at birth and cease only at death. - Albert Einstein

The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything. - Frank Sinatra

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Clients don't care about the labor pains; they want to see the baby. - Tim Williams

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

Not the cry, but the flight of a wild duck, leads the flock to fly and follow. - Chinese Proverb

The most important question in the world is, "Why is the child crying?" - Alice Walker

Don't cry when the sun is gone, because the tears won't let you see the stars. - Violeta Parra

I've made a lot of grown men cry with laughter because I really am quite the joke. - Peta Wilson

Man should not try to avoid stress any more than he would shun food, love, or exercise. - Hans Selye

If newborn babies could speak they would be the most intelligent beings on planet earth. - Jaden Smith

It's one of the great urban myths that people get pregnant in order to have children. - Menzies Campbell

I want to break something, or hit something, but I am afraid to move, so I start crying instead. - Veronica Roth

Life is a combination of laughter and tears, and it's almost always better to laugh than to cry. - Teresa Medeiros

I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend. - Rodney Dangerfield

If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars. - Rabindranath Tagore

A certificate of live birth is not the same thing by any stretch of the imagination as a birth certificate. - Donald Trump

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

Crying doesn't indicate that you are weak. Ever since you were born it's been a sign that you are alive. - Unknown

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown

The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

As an experienced artist, I carry my work like a secret pregnancy. I am always aware of inner life and the need to protect it. - Julia Cameron

No one ever wants to see his or her name linked to anything bad. Conscience is like a baby. It has to go to sleep before you can. - Harvey Mackay

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

Our babies are like penguins; penguin babies can't exist unless more than one person is taking care of them. They just can't keep going. - Alison Gopnik


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