#1 humor site on the 'net

The Honey Truck

Where a Flush Beats a Full House

The Honey Truck thanks to Don Delcourt

This flush even beats 'Four-of-a-Kind'!

QuotaBills
Buzz Saw: A honey of a tool. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Johnny Cash: A dime for the pay toilet - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Living is like licking honey off a thorn. - Unknown

Poker is a tough way to make an easy living. - Bob Thompson

Life is a flower of which love is the honey. - Victor Hugo

BBS: Tall tales told by insects that give honey - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

It's not the years, honey. It's the mileage. - Indiana Jones

Hope is the only bee that makes honey without flowers. - Robert G Ingersoll

Never do card tricks for the boys you play poker with. - American Proverb

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar. - Unknown

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

If you want to gather honey, don't kick over the beehive. - Dale Carnegie

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

I used to practice Tony speeches in my bathroom with my hairbrush. - Audra McDonald

Most of the time he sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper. - Rex Reed

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother. - Ronnie Spector

Cash Flow: The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

High school is a lot like toilet paper: you only miss it when it's gone. - Unknown

Moderation, honey, in all things but love and chocolate. That's my motto. - Barbara Bretton

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

Sweet words are like honey, a little may refresh, but too much gluts the stomach. - Anne Bradstreet

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

Music Lover: A man, who upon hearing a soprano in the bathroom, puts his ear to the keyhole - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. - Steven Wright

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

How little you know about the age you live in if you think that honey is sweeter than cash in hand. - Ovid

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

It's triple the Trump this season... I invited my children, Don Jr. and Ivanka into the boardroom. - Donald Trump

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

The seeds of learning can grow almost anywhere. Trump University and my other education-related ventures like... - Donald Trump

Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle

This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, "Honey, do this," and "Honey, do that" around the house. - Jim Lemon


Donut Hole History

Church Flight

Jews: The Revenge

Israel Security

Breakfast In Bed

Antler Field

Redneck Stove Burner

Texas Earrings

A Man's Life

Dog Walker

New Zealand Prepares For War

Window Washing Daredevil

Aussie Ford Coupe

Pushing The Envelope

Window Fall Repair

Bacon Balls

Tiny Forest

Inside Loo View

Finally 21

Diet Swing

Vealy Big Meal

Just Like Grandpa

Long Liquor Store

Musical Spoons