Swimming Without Getting Your Hair Wet

Only dead fish swim with the stream. - Unknown

The water doesn't know how old you are. - Dara Torres

Water that does not move is always shallow. - Sami Proverb

If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it. - Jonathan Winters

You never miss the water till the well has run dry. - Irish Proverb

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

This is the place to be - in the land of swimming pools. - David Hockney

You can't cross the sea merely by staring at the water. - Rabindranath Tagore

There's one good thing about being bald: it's neat. - Milton Berle

Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed. - Josh Billings

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool. - L.M. Boyd

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

Live in the sunshine
Swim in the sea
Drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it. - Woodrow Wilson

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

Our separation from each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. - Albert Einstein

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it. - Joan Rivers

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on. - Louis L'Amour

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. - Thomas Jefferson

When ya go out there in the water and ya start crossing your longirudes and lassitudes. - Archie Bunker

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

If you are in the job for glamour, you're in for the shock of your life. The media is a huge shark pool. - Trisha Goddard

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

Happiness consists in activity: such is the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and not a stagnant pool. - John M. Good

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown