Segway Stroller

Women Liberteens - Archie Bunker

There are no ugly women, only lazy ones. - Helena Rubinstein

Hell hath no fury like a woman's corns. - Archie Bunker

He who looketh upon a woman loseth a fender. - Auto repair shop

A woman is as old as she looks before breakfast. - Edgar W Howe

A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain. - WC Fields

Jade: A semi-precious stone or a semi-precious woman - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Chaos: Three women discussing the two sides of an issue - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Temptation is a woman's weapon and man's excuse. - H L Mencken

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. - Groucho Marx

I love bringing roses to a woman when she least expects it. - Esai Morales

Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee. - Stephanie Piro

Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact. - Ambrose Bierce

A meal without cheese is like a beautiful woman who lacks an eye. - Jean A Brillat-Savarin

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. - Mae West

As long as she thinks of a man, nobody objects to a woman thinking. - Virginia Woolf

Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another. - H L Mencken

The test of a man or woman's breeding is how they behave in a quarrel. - George Bernard Shaw

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. - Aristotle Onassis

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. - Chris Rock

Glamour: The capacity of a woman to get more out of a dress than she puts into it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

A woman is the full circle. Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform. - Diane Mariechild

Co-Operation: An exchange between a woman and a man in which she coos and he operates - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Women have a hard enough time in this world; telling them the truth would be too cruel. - H L Mencken

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

Amnesia: The condition that enables a woman who has gone through labour to have sex again. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher

Beauty Parlor: 1. A place where women curl up and dye; 2. A place where everybody knows your MANE. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Conscientious Woman: One who never breaks a confidence without first imposing the strictest secrecy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a woman. - Virginia Woolf

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed. - Godfrey Winn

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. - Groucho Marx

She wore far too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always a sign of despair in a woman. - Oscar Wilde

From a shy, timid girl I had become a woman of resolute character, who could no longer be frightened by the struggle with troubles. - Anna Dostoevsky

When I was a young man I vowed never to marry until I found the ideal woman. Well, I found her but, alas, she was waiting for the ideal man. - Alain

The 77 cents that women make for every dollar men earn makes a real difference to our families - families stretching to make every dollar count. - Barbara Mikulski

Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com