Segway Stroller

The legs are the wheels of creativity. - Albert Einstein

Hell hath no fury like a woman's corns. - Archie Bunker

Never argue with a woman, a winner, or a weapon. - Frank Dane

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. - Jim Carrey

A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke. - Rudyard Kipling

I've been told I'm a role model to many women. - Donald Trump

A wit should be no more sincere than a woman constant. - William Congreve

Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. - Billy Crystal

When the devil finds a lazy woman, he puts her to work. - Russian Proverb

Women like silent men, they think they're listening. - George Carlin

Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract. - Kathy Lette

The only place men want depth in a woman is in her decolletage. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age. - George Burns

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke. - Groucho Marx

Surely a pretty woman never looks prettier than when making tea. - Mary E. Braddon

There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works. - Will Rogers

When women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands. - H L Mencken

High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead. - Christopher Morley

A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. - Oliver Herford

Here's to strong women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them. - Unknown

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction. - Oscar Wilde

This woman was so cross-eyed. She can go to a tennis match and never move her head. - Phyllis Diller

Women have a hard enough time in this world; telling them the truth would be too cruel. - H L Mencken

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

The most terrifying thing any woman can say to me is, 'Notice anything different?' - Mike Vanatta

You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, which doesn't say much for you. - Groucho Marx

Some old women and men grow bitter with age. The more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get. - George D. Prentice

I think women are foolish to pretend they are equal to men - they are far superior and always have been. - William Golding

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you get between the right man and the right woman. - Woody Allen

There goes a woman who knows all the things that can be taught and none of the things that cannot be taught. - Coco Chanel

For twenty-four years I've been in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me. - Henny Youngman

Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

Part of the reason that men seem so much less loving than women is that men's behavior is measured with a feminine ruler. - Francesca M. Cancian

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh. - Conan O'Brien

Like many other women, I could not understand why every man who changed a diaper has felt impelled, in recent years, to write a book about it. - Barbara Ehrenreich

I have not the shadow of a doubt that any man or woman can achieve what I have, if he or she will make the same effort, and have the same hope and faith. - Mahatma Gandhi

I think Irish women are strong as horses, incredibly loyal and for the most part, funny, witty, bright and optimistic in the face of devastating reality. - Fionnula Flanagan

Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men; although he was twice married, it never occurred to him to verify this statement by examining his wives' mouths. - Bertrand Russell

Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president I mean, she's a woman, and I'm not s'posedta say bad things, but really, folks, come on. Are we serious? - Donald Trump