Santa Cats

Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

A meowing cat catches no mice. - Yiddish proverb

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

Cataract: Where cats hang their coats. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Modesty is not only an ornament, but also a guard to virtue. - Joseph Addison

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. - Wesley Bates

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. - Groucho Marx

It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. - Unknown

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill

I love cats because I enjoy my home, and little by little they become its visible soul. - Jean Cocteau

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

Always the cat remains a little beyond the limits we try to set for him in our blind folly. - Andre Norton

Skunk: 1. A streamlined cat with a 2-tone finish and a fluid drive; 2. A community scenter. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Francis Bacon