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New Deer Rifle

Sighting in your expensive new deer rifle

1. Shiny new, high-powered deer rifle... $1,200
2. Quality, high-powered scope... $550
3. Bore sighting device... $140
4. Hospital Visit... $4,893
5. Forgetting to remove the bore sighting device prior to shooting?
Priceless!
Deer 1 Hunter 0
GAME OVER
New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

QuotaBills
Shoot folly as it flies. - Alexander Pope

Hunters do it with a big bang. - Unknown

A wounded deer leaps the highest. - Emily Dickinson

Deer hunters will do anything for a buck. - Unknown

Aim high and you won’t shoot your foot off. - Phyllis Diller

If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer? - Steven Wright

Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself. - Unknown

Hunting: the least honorable form of war on the weak. - Paul Richard

Please do not shoot the pianist. He is doing his best. - Oscar Wilde

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. - George Burns

Shooting Star: A famous actor who uses his gun too often - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fox hunting is the unspeakable in pursuit of the inedible. - Oscar Wilde

Deer hunting would be fine sport, if only the deer had guns. - W S Gilbert

Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? - George Carlin

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

Vegetarian: an old Indian word for "doesn't hunt well." - Paul Harvey

Shoot a few scenes out of focus. I want to win the foreign film award. - Billy Wilder

Problem solving is hunting. It is savage pleasure and we are born to it. - Thomas Harris

If you need 100 rounds to kill a deer, maybe hunting isn't your sport. - Elayne Boosler

If the hunter comes back with mushrooms, don't ask him how his hunt was. - Ghanaian Proverb

Grandchildren are God's rewards to grandparents for not shooting their children. - Unknown

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target. - Ashleigh Brilliant

Though so trifling, the success of our first Buffalo hunt gave us quite a social lift. - Ernest T. Seton

An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer. - Philip II

In my cosmology, indigenous wild deer are more important than exotic ornamental shrubs. - Elizabeth M. Thomas

A hunt based only on trophies taken falls far short of what the ultimate goal should be. - Fred Bear

While I love shooting in New York City, I look forward to filming season six in Los Angeles. - Donald Trump

The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead

There are sadistic scientists who hurry to hunt down errors instead of establishing the truth. - Marie Curie

My tastes are not those of the king, who has none, except for hunting and mechanic's labour. - Marie Antoinette

The fabled musk deer searches the world over for the source of the scent which comes from itself. - Ramakrishna

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called 'hunting for your spectacles.' - Edward Grey

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. - P G Wodehouse

You've probably got a device on you that can shoot decent video, so what's stopping you? Capture and share some moments. - Steve Garfield

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused. - Steven Wright

I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters, okay? It's, like, incredible. - Donald Trump

When I came back to Dublin, I was courtmartialled in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence. - Brendan Behan

There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter. - Ernest Hemingway


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