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New Deer Rifle

Sighting in your expensive new deer rifle

1. Shiny new, high-powered deer rifle... $1,200
2. Quality, high-powered scope... $550
3. Bore sighting device... $140
4. Hospital Visit... $4,893
5. Forgetting to remove the bore sighting device prior to shooting?
Priceless!
Deer 1 Hunter 0
GAME OVER
New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

New Deer Rifle thanks to Jack Byrd, Atlanta, Georgia

QuotaBills
A wounded deer leaps the highest. - Emily Dickinson

Donation: A country full of female deer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Deer hunters will do anything for a buck. - Unknown

Aim high and you won’t shoot your foot off. - Phyllis Diller

Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself. - Unknown

Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting. - Christopher Morley

Please do not shoot the pianist. He is doing his best. - Oscar Wilde

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. - George Burns

Head Hunter: The person to see if you have lost your head - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fox hunting is the unspeakable in pursuit of the inedible. - Oscar Wilde

Stucco: What a lot of house hunters are getting these days - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

Diploma: 1. Da man dat fixes your pipes; 2. A job-hunting license. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Vegetarian: an old Indian word for "doesn't hunt well." - Paul Harvey

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

Shoot a few scenes out of focus. I want to win the foreign film award. - Billy Wilder

If you need 100 rounds to kill a deer, maybe hunting isn't your sport. - Elayne Boosler

If the hunter comes back with mushrooms, don't ask him how his hunt was. - Ghanaian Proverb

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game. - Paul Rodriguez

Grandchildren are God's rewards to grandparents for not shooting their children. - Unknown

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target. - Ashleigh Brilliant

Husband-hunting: A sport in which the animal that gets caught has to buy the license - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Though so trifling, the success of our first Buffalo hunt gave us quite a social lift. - Ernest T. Seton

In my cosmology, indigenous wild deer are more important than exotic ornamental shrubs. - Elizabeth M. Thomas

A hunt based only on trophies taken falls far short of what the ultimate goal should be. - Fred Bear

While I love shooting in New York City, I look forward to filming season six in Los Angeles. - Donald Trump

Attitude is everything - shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll be among the stars. - Les Brown

There are sadistic scientists who hurry to hunt down errors instead of establishing the truth. - Marie Curie

I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my food. I don't even know where Sandwiches live. - Bill Murray

My tastes are not those of the king, who has none, except for hunting and mechanic's labour. - Marie Antoinette

Consultants are people who come down from the hill to shoot the wounded after the battle is over. - Doc Blakeley

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

A critic is someone who never actually goes to the battle, yet who afterwards comes out shooting the wounded. - Tyne Daly

I became hooked on the idea of being able to shoot an image and process it myself, and end up with a product. - Leonard Nimoy

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called 'hunting for your spectacles.' - Edward Grey

When you hunt animals, you may succeed or not. But when you open the fridge, you will succeed a hundred percent of the time. - Nora Volkow

I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters, okay? It's, like, incredible. - Donald Trump


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