#1 humor site on the 'net

Jockey Racing

Jockeying for position in the new Kentucky Derby format

Jockey Racing thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Win, Place or Show, all 3 jockeys are winners

QuotaBills
Plodding wins the race. - Aesop

Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just run. - Unknown

Quicksand: Beach where motor races are held - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Lend a horse, and you may have back his skin. - English Proverb

Few girls are as well shaped as a good horse. - Christopher Morley

The old horse in the stable still yearns to run. - Mongolian Proverb

Mathematics knows no races or geographic boundaries. - David Hilbert

This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother. - Ted Walsh

I do not regard a broker as a member of the human race. - Honore de Balzac

A rabbit's foot is a poor substitute for horse sense. - Unknown

Horse Manure: 50p per pre-packed bag. 20p - do it your self. - Unknown

Whenever I see an adult on a bicycle I have hope for the human race. - H G Wells

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. - Mark Twain

England is an empire, Germany is a nation, a race, France is a person. - Jules Michelet

Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another. - Walter Elliott

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. - WC Fields

A horse doesn't care how much you know until it knows how much you care. - Tom Smith

It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse. - Adlai Stevenson

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. - Lily Tomlin

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

In the Moscow Olympics, Lasse Viren came in fifth and ran a champion's race. - David Coleman

Take care to sell your horse before he dies. The art of life is passing losses on. - Robert Frost

In my world, everyone's a pony and they all eat rainbows and poop butterflies! - Dr. Seuss

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

One of the worst things that can happen in life is to win a bet on a horse at an early age. - Danny McGoorty

The human race is inquisitive about other people's lives, but negligent to correct their own. - St Augustine

It is not best that we should all think alike; it is differences of opinion that make horse races. - Mark Twain

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

Democracy is very different in U.S. and A. from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot! - Borat Sagdiyev

I've got something inside of me, peasantlike and stubborn, and I'm in it till the end of the race. - Truman Capote

Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse and make him wince; but, one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still. - Samuel Johnson

Do you ever get halfway through eating a horse and go, 'You know, I'm not as hungry as I thought I was'? - Tim Vinel

Our loyalties must transcend our race, our tribe, our class, and our nation; and this means we must develop a world perspective. - Martin Luther King Jr.

It's like running a marathon race. We train all hours of the day. When you are taking a bath, you are thinking of the flight. - Kalpana Chawla

The world, the race, the soul - in space and time the universes,
All bound as is befitting each - all surely going somewhere. - Walt Whitman

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking. - Bill Vaughan

In the marathon a crazy athlete can just keep pushing from the beginning; at a championship you don't need a time just to win the race. - Haile Gebrelassie

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison


Detroit Discovery

Down Under Statue

Frankfurt Subway Entrance

Missing Mother-In-Law

I'll Be Right There

Flower Frame Heels

Studley Tool Chest

Dr. Hedgehog

Enjoy The View

Locks Of Love

Redneck Speed Bump

Save A Tree

Baby Papaya Crossing

So You Want A Day Off

Mexico Will Pay For The Wall

Behind Every Man

Truck Driver Birth

Motion Picture Selfie

FearBusters

Holy Day Inn

Fat Friend Prayer

Weather Rock - For Accurate Forecasts

Moses Parting the Ice Field

Nutella Face Lotion