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IRS Middle Class Pencil Sharpener

Exercise to help you prepare for this year's taxes!

IRS Middle Class Pencil Sharpener thanks to Bob 'MoSkeeterz' Carroll

Let the government sharpen your pencils

Taxes
Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he's fed.

Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.

Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.

Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.

Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he tries to think.

Tax his cigars,
Tax his beers,
If he cries, then tax his tears.

Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Find other ways to tax his ass.

Tax all he has,
Then let him know
That you won't be done 'til he has no dough.

When he screams and hollers,
Then tax him some more,
Tax him till he's good and sore.

Then tax his coffin,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in which he's laid.

Put these words upon his tomb,
“Taxes drove me to my doom.”

When he's gone, do not relax,
Its time to apply
The inheritance tax...

... and just a few more...
Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Excise Taxes
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel permit tax
Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)
Gross Receipts Tax
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Interest expense
Inventory tax
IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties
Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Personal Property Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service charge taxes
Social Security Tax
Road usage taxes
Sales Tax
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone federal excise tax
Telephone federal universal service fee tax
Telephone federal, state and local surcharge taxes
Telephone minimum usage surcharge tax
Telephone recurring and non-recurring charges tax
Telephone state and local tax
Telephone usage charge tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax

Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago...
We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world,
and Mom stayed home to raise the kids...
What happened? Can you spell 'politicians'?
QuotaBills
All politics is local. - Thomas P O'Neil

Stress makes you stupid. - Unknown

Where a man feels pain he lays his hand. - Dutch Proverb

Everybody knows politics is a contact sport. - Barrack Obama

I'm very strongly against tax increases. - Donald Trump

A politician... one that would circumvent God. - William Shakespeare

Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory. - John Kenneth Galbraith

It is easy to stand a pain, but difficult to stand an itch. - Chang Ch'ao

How much pain have cost us the evils that have never happened. - Thomas Jefferson

It's a terrible shame that politics has become show business. - Sydney Pollack

An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought. - Simon Cameron

A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Tex Guinan

A politician is a man who approaches every problem with an open mouth. - Adlai Stevenson

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

Out of suffering comes creativity. You cannot spell painting without pain. - John Lithgow

The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them. - Bill Vaughan

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

My greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live. - Kanye West

There are no crooked politicians in America. They've legalized their thievery. - Frank Dane

You purchase pain with all that joy can give and die of nothing but a rage to live. - Alexander Pope

I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can't get killed by a blank? - Milton Berle

Stress is your body's way of saying you haven't worked enough unpaid overtime. - Scott Adams

Mathematics is the cheapest science. All one needs for mathematics is a pencil and a paper. - George Polya

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain

So, if we lie to the government, it's a felony.
But if they lie to us, it's politics. - Bill Murray

Get thee glass eyes;
And, like a scurvy politician, seem
To see the things thou dost not. - William Shakespeare

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. - Thomas Jefferson

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

Where there is an income tax, the just man will pay more and the unjust less on the same amount of income. - Plato

Pain is neither intolerable nor everlasting... it is in the power of the soul to maintain its own serenity. - Marcus Aurelius

Politics: Poli, a Latin word meaning "many"; and tics, meaning "bloodsucking creatures." - Robin Williams

Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. - John Kenneth Galbraith

It is a win-win for the American people, an idea no conventional politician would have the guts to put forward. - Donald Trump

Calculating how much carbon is absorbed by which forests and farms is a tricky task, especially when politicians do it. - Donella Meadows

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. - Hartman Jule

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce

A formal manipulator in mathematics often experiences the discomforting feeling that his pencil surpasses him in intelligence. - Howard Eves

Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the Government take care of him, better take a closer look at the American Indian. - Henry Ford

Regarded simply as a politician, and compared with the other leading political figures of our time, how clean a smell he has managed to leave behind. - Mahatma Gandhi


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