House Appraisal

Every man is a king at home. - English Proverb

Home is a refuge for all good men. - Unknown

Ideal Guest: One who stays at home - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There will be no whitewash at the White House. - Richard M Nixon

Choose your neighbor before you buy your house. - African Proverb

Heaven is home. Utopia is here. Nirvana is now. - Edward Abbey

He'd go through the house like Typhoon Mary. - Archie Bunker

We can dance on pinheads till the cows come home. - Alastair Campbell

Pedestrian: a man whose son is home from college. - Unknown

Home is any four walls that enclose the right person. - Helen Rowland

There is nothing like staying at home for real comfort. - Jane Austen

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. - Unknown

While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home. - Unknown

A man's home is his castle, and his wife is the janitor. - Lucille Kallen

A consultant is an ordinary man away from home giving advice. - Oscar Wilde

An empty purse and a new house make a man wise, but too late. - Portuguese Proverb

I have so much hair, I have a separate wig closet in my house. - Sherri Shepherd

To be happy in the home is the ultimate result of all ambition. - Samuel Johnson

I suppose I could have stayed home and baked cookies and had teas. - Hillary Clinton

There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. - Wesley Bates

Hidin' out in the house all the time, like some Bantam of the Opera. - Archie Bunker

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home. - Robert Orben

That's the best part of going away for a vacation - coming home again. - Madeleine L'Engle

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home. - Phyllis Diller

A gentleman should never leave the house without a sharp knife, a good watch, and great hat. - Unknown

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

She did not know where her home was anymore, and this idea didn’t frighten her like it should. - T.M. Williams

You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax - tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough. - Pearl Williams

Fang can't stand to see trash & garbage lying around the house. He can't stand the competition. - Phyllis Diller

A woman should cleave into her husband. Right here in this house is where Edith's cleavage belongs. - Archie Bunker

How do we persevere when we're adrift at sea, severed from wherever or whomever is our 'home'? - Lois Anderson

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires. - Dorothy Parker

There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house. - Joe Ryan

We can't win at home, we can't win away. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play. - Jock Brown

Went to Disneyland because my daughter's obsessed with Mickey Mouse. She was so excited when I got home and told her. - Ryan Reynolds

The most dangerous person of the world is a member of the United States Congress just home from a three-day fact-finding trip. - Johnny Isakson

One need not be a chamber to be haunted;
One need not be a house;
The brain has corridors surpassing
Material place. - Emily Dickinson

I love working for myself from home. I get along with everyone in the office; I can show up in pajamas, and I always win Employee of the Month. - Missy Miwac

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright

This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, "Honey, do this," and "Honey, do that" around the house. - Jim Lemon