High Heel Diver

So much work, so few women to do it. - Unknown

When women go wrong, men go right after them. - Mae West

A man thinks he knows, but a woman knows better. - Indian Proverb

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition. - Timothy Leary

When women enter middle age, it gives men a pause. - Unknown

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. - Jim Carrey

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

I hate women because they always know where things are. - Voltaire

A weeping man and a smiling woman are not to be trusted. - Indian Proverb

Don't bargain for fish which are still in the water. - India Proverb

I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. - G K Chesterton

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women. - WC Fields

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

It is human nature to think wisely and act in an absurd fashion. - Anatole France

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

The 3 fastest means of communication: Twitter; Telephone; Tell a woman. - Unknown

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. - Chris Rock

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

An ugly woman is a disease of the stomach; a handsome woman a disease of the head. - Italian Proverb

In Hollywood, the women are all peaches. It makes one long for an apple occasionally. - W Somerset Maugham

When once a woman has given you her heart, you can never get rid of the rest of her body. - John Vanbrugh

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her. - Oscar Wilde

I walk around like everything if fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off. - Unknown

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious. - Oscar Wilde

Some old women and men grow bitter with age. The more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get. - George D. Prentice

The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me. - George Bernard Shaw

Whatever I am offered in devotion with a pure heart - a leaf, a flower, fruit, or water - I accept with joy. - Bhagavad Gita

Milton's style was exactly right for what he did. He had enormous energy. Enormous vitality. He still does. - Steve Allen

For twenty-four years I've been in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me. - Henny Youngman

The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about. - Oscar Wilde

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It's staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in. - Casey Stengel