QuotaBillsA wig is a wig is a wig. - Billy Zane
Long on hair, sort on brains. - French Proverb
Barbed Wire: A sarcastic telegram. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? - George Carlin
Even the worst haircut eventually grows out. - Lisa Kogan
Is that a beard, or are you eating a muskrat? - Dr Gonzo
A hair in the head is worth two in the brush. - Oliver Herford
He doesn't dye his hair, he bleaches his face. - Johnny Carson
Don't point that beard at me – it might go off. - Groucho Marx
Every day People straighten up the hair, why not the heart? - Ernesto Guevara
Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum. - P G Wodehouse
I really mustache you a question... but I'll shave it for later. - Unknown
I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair. - Tom Sharp
If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle. - Hillary Clinton
People think a Muslim has to have a turban or a big beard. It's stupid. - T-Pain
We're all just ghosts on a wire seeking the prick of an electric thought. - Robert Fanney
Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller
I don't want a wig that looks like a wig; I want one that could pass for a weave. - Nicki Minaj
A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. - Steve Martin
If you wear a wig, everybody notices. But if you then dye the wig, people notice the dye. - Andy Warhol
I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood
Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock
For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson
I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere
Do I have a large frog in my hair? I'm worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten. - Joaquin Phoenix
I like to put on a wig or a fake mustache and do something silly with friends, do a little dance. - Tom Lenk
Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns
Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. - Khalil Gibran
A woman's dress should be like a barbed-wire fence: serving its purpose without obstructing the view. - Sophia Loren
Our oldest son was trying to find himself for about a year. Then one day he got a haircut, and found himself. - Phil Callaway
You really just want to know that somebody loves you for you. Sometimes you feel like an ATM machine with a wig on it. - Mariah Carey
Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde
Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower. - Elayne Boosler
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing
Kissing a man with a beard is a lot like going to a picnic. You don't mind going through a little bush to get there! - Minnie Pearl
I wore a thong and a bra and a wig. Those things hurt. I mean, thongs? Like, they dig in. It takes a tough man to be a woman. - Hank Azaria
I'm acting when I serve as a hostess, when I run my wig business. I was born to act, and life itself is the greatest part. - Eva Gabor
You can not prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building a nest in your hair. - Chinese Proverb
As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah
When I was six, I entered a talent contest. I dyed my hair blond, had a chainsaw and pretended I was Eminem. The old folk weren't expecting that. - Nico Mirallegro