#1 humor site on the 'net

First Performance

Your child's 1st performance with bear-ly any mistakes!

First Performance thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Practicing to a captive teddy bear audience

QuotaBills
Jazz is democracy in music. - Wynton Marsalis

Where words fail, music speaks. - Hans Christian Anderson

The piano has been drinking, not me. - Tom Waits

Without music, life would be a mistake. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The piano ain't got no wrong notes. - Thelonious Monk

You rarely meet a wino with perfect pitch. - George Carlin

Wagner's music is better than it sounds. - Mark Twain

Rock and roll: music for the neck downwards. - Keith Richards

Music is well said to be the speech of angels. - Thomas Carlyle

I hate music - especially when it's played. - Jimmy Durante

Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music. - Ronald Reagan

Making music should not be left to the professionals. - Michelle Shocked

Dancing can reveal all the mystery that music conceals. - Charles Baudelaire

Music is the art which is most nigh to tears and memory. - Oscar Wilde

The music is all around us. All you have to do is listen. - August Rush

After Rossini dies, who will there be to promote his music? - Richard Wagner

Music can be made anywhere, is invisible and does not smell. - W H Auden

The sweetest music in the world to every person is his own name. - Unknown

The symphony must be like the world. It must embrace everything. - Gustav Mahler

Nothing is capable of being well set to music that is not nonsense. - Joseph Addison

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune. - Kin Hubbard

The power of music feels like taking a a nice brake from this busy world. - Millie DeWitt

All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff. - Frank Zappa

There are eighty-eight keys on a piano and within that, an entire universe. - James Rhodes

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. - John Erskine

Each soul is tuned to a different pitch. Music is about harmonizing the soul. - Wu-Tang Clan

Most people live and die with their music still unplayed. They never dare to try. - Mary Kay Ash

I think my music is like anchovies - some people like it, some people get nauseous. - Barry Manilow

Film is one of the three universal languages, the other two: mathematics and music. - Frank Capra

It requires wisdom to understand wisdom: the music is nothing if the audience is deaf. - Walter Lippmann

Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on. - Samuel Butler

Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin - it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring. - S.J. Perelman

He is a rarity which I cannot but be fond of, as one would be of a hog that could fiddle, or a singing owl. - John W. Rochester

What's the earth with all its art, verse, music, worth -
Compared with love, found, gained, and kept? - Robert Browning

The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular? - David Sarnoff

Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid. - Frank Zappa

Morals are an acquirement - like music, like a foreign language, like piety, poker, paralysis - no man is born with them. - Mark Twain

The greatest sweetener of human life is Friendship. To raise this to the highest pitch of enjoyment, is a secret which but few discover. - Joseph Addison

When I was nine, my father said 'You can take piano lessons or do karate' - I had a black belt and was competing before I was 19. - Elodie Yung

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means put down. - Bob Newhart


Cheap Child Support

Ankle Warning

Peanut Sale

Beer Chess

Astronomy Perspective

Wolf Chase

Coffee Caricature

The Working Man

North of Somewhere

Salmon Bikini

Mexican Phys Ed Classes

Parasite Trivia

Plug Puller

Steamworks Bathroom

Another Repost

Pipeline Protesters

Bread Gloves

Winterpeg Warm

Pen Sale Not

Soda Bottle Boat

Raccoon Rock

Cement Truck Lane

Air Wakanda

Birthday Bonus