Divorce Defined

Lawyers are merchants of misery. - Nancy Levit

Common sense often makes good law. - William O Douglas

Lawyers are the jackals of commerce. - Elbert Hubbard

All children are essentially criminal. - Denis Diderot

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once. - Charles Lamb

We judge of man's wisdom by his hope. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Swift justice demands more than just swiftness. - Potter Stewart

It is not wisdom but authority that makes a law. - Thomas Hobbes

Lawyers are the foot soldiers of our Constitution. - Rennard Strickland

A successful lawsuit is the one worn by a policeman. - Robert Frost

The law must be stable, but it must not stand still. - Roscoe Pound

I have always fought for concrete facts, for justice. - Fidel Castro

Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy. - Groucho Marx

A jury is composed of twelve men of average ignorance. - Herbert Spencer

You shall judge a man by his foes as well as by his friends. - Joseph Conrad

Sometimes justice is at its most merciful when it's blind. - Nancy Gibbs

There is no distinctly American criminal class - except Congress. - Mark Twain

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

Real Estate: What your house is called during divorce proceedings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can not stop the spread of an idea by passing a law against it. - Harry S Truman

The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes. - Oscar Wilde

Do not judge a man until you have walked two moons in his moccasins. - Native American Proverb

Laws are not masters but servants, and he rules them who obeys them. - Henry Ward Beecher

Lawyers are a bad lot... They cheat their living out of honest people. - Albert R Carman

The laws of probability - so true in general, so fallacious in particular. - Edward Gibbon

The first and fundamental law of nature is to seek out peace and follow it. - Thomas Hobbes

Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim. - Bertrand Russell

I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. - Henny Youngman

You cannot live without the lawyers, and certainly you cannot die without them. - Joseph H Choate

People who use lawyers are not people you would really want to hang around with. - Deborah Ross

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

If a man dies and leaves his estate in an uncertain condition, the lawyers become his heirs. - Edgar Watson Howe

Most of the dishonest lawyers are the product of dishonest clients - the demand creates the supply. - Morris Salem

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I used the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. - Fred Allen

The trouble with our laws these days is that the criminals know their rights better than their wrongs. - Unknown

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense. - Edsgar Dijkstra

When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce. - Woody Allen

Beware of lawyers and consultants and people who do not take risks and who do not get their hands dirty. - Felix G Rohatyn

In a litigation-happy society, clear agreements often prevent small disagreements form becoming big ones. - Harvey Mackay

I have a huge interest in hockey because I grew up in Canada, where it's kind of the law that you love hockey. - Matthew Perry

Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods. - Albert Einstein

If you want to kill an idea without being identified as the assassin, suggest that the legal department take a look at it. - Scott Adams

Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted? - George Carlin

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams

When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. - Norm Crosby

A judge who likes every outcome he reaches is very likely a bad judge, stretching for results he prefers rather than those the law demands. - Neil Gorsuch

While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously. - Tim Allen

A lawyer's performance in the courtroom is responsible for about 25 percent of the outcome; the remaining 75 percent depends on the facts. - Melvin Belli

The Post Office just recalled their newest stamps. They had a picture of lawyers on them, and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on. - Marvin Lebman