Computer Bread

The computer is a moron. - Peter F Drucker

Life is too short to be on a diet. - Taylor J Reid

Defect-free software does not exist. - Wietse Venema

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands. - Unknown

What was the best thing before sliced bread? - George Carlin

The internet is a great way to get on the net. - Bob Dole

I took the initiative in creating the internet. - Al Gore

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet. - Unknown

Hardware: the parts of a computer that can be kicked. - Jeff Pesis

A balanced diet is a Cracker Jack cookie in each hand. - Joe-kster

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

The upper crust is a bunch of crumbs held together by dough. - Joseph A. Thomas

Iconomic: Making do with fewer icons on your computer desktop - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben

I don't diet, I just don't eat as much as I'd like to. - Linda Evangelista

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

All the honesty in the world ain't legal tender for a loaf of bread. - Josh Billings

I'm an emotional eater. When I get upset, my diet goes out the window. - Kelly Osbourne

On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the 'escape' key. - Unknown

Ever notice that the hardness of the butter increases with the softness of the bread? - Unknown

Keyboard: 1. Place to hang your keys; 2. The standard way to generate computer errors. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Make pumpkin bread as the default gift for everyone. It is cheap, it is beloved, it is carbs. - Karen Bender

Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies. - Milton Berle

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life. - Andrew Brown

Man is the cheapest 150-pound nonlinear, all-purpose computer system which can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. - NASA

People enjoy the interaction on the internet, and the feeling of belonging to a group that does something interesting. - Linus Torvalds

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

I've been doing projects outdoors for the public. I made pigeons eat geometry by putting bread out in rhomboids and triangles. - Jenny Holzer

The day I made that statement, about inventing the internet, I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the camcorder. - Al Gore

I'm off the diet, but not the treadmill. I speak as someone who's attempted to lose weight and get fit thrice before in my life. - Ronnie Screwvala

My daily diet consists of basically anything I think looks tasty, whether that's pizza, sushi, burgers, quesadillas. I like everything. - Cameron Dallas

The majority of people who don't have Internet don't have the Internet because they don't know why they want to use the Internet. - Mark Zuckerberg

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney

The problem with the internet is that it gives you everything - reliable material and crazy material. So the problem becomes, how do you discriminate? - Umberto Eco