Coffin Dragster

I hope they bury me near a strait man. - Groucho Marx

I want to die young at an advanced age. - Max Lerner

Death is philosophy's only problem. - Albert Camus

Laughter would be bereaved if snobbery died. - Peter Ustinov

To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die. - Clyde Campbell

Death is the sound of distant thunder at a picnic. - W H Auden

When the rich make war it's the poor that die. - Jean-Paul Sartre

He hungered for posterity, and he died from hunger. - Gregory Nunn

Because I could not stop for Death He kindly stopped for me. - Emily Dickinson

In truth,there was only one christian and he died on the cross. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

My own business always bores me to death; I prefer other people's. - Oscar Wilde

Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily. - Napoleon Bonaparte

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. - H L Mencken

Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. Its their way of falling. - Andre Gide

I believe that people would be alive today if there were a death penalty. - Nancy Reagan

Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - Mahatma Gandhi

He was so crooked that when he died they had to screw him into the ground. - Bob Hope

Only faith in Christ gives rise to a culture contrary to egotism and death. - Pope John Paul II

A living person whom death has deprived of the power of filial ingratitude. - Ambrose Bierce

Was Uncle Oscar's death very untimely, you ask? Well, it was near lunch. - Archie Bunker

Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time. - George Carlin

On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done easily lying down. - Woody Allen

My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair. - Rodney Dangerfield

Everybody has got to die, but I have always believed an exception would be made in my case. - William Saroyan

Are you a man with a conscience, or just a shark who will die when you stop moving forward? - Roderick Vincent

For us humans, everything is permanent - until it changes, as we are immortal until we die. - Malcolm Muggeridge

To be born free is an accident; to live free a responsibility; to die free is an obligation. - Mrs. Hubbard Davis

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. - George Carlin

Half the people in Hollywood are dying to be discovered and the other half are afraid they will be. - Lionel Barrymore

There's a thing that keeps surprising you about stormy old friends after they die: their silence. - Ben Hecht

If men could see the epitaphs their friends write they would believe they had got into the wrong grave. - American Proverb

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality through not dying. - Woody Allen

Why is it that people rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the people involved. - Mark Twain

Some men storm imaginary Alps all their lives, and die in the foothills cursing difficulties which do not exist. - Edgar W Howe

The vivacity of children is always charming, because it is always sincere. A grave child is a rose without fragrance. - Unknown

I was court-martialled in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence. - Brendan Behan

My mother reads the obituary page every day, but she could never understand how people always die in alphabetical order. - Frank Carson

To be idle is a short road to death and to be diligent is a way of life; foolish people are idle, wise people are diligent. - Buddha

I don't believe in dying. It's been done. I'm working on a new exit. Besides, I can't die now - I'm booked. - George Burns

Clay. It's rain, dead leaves, dust, all my dead ancestors. Stones that have been ground into sand. Mud. The whole cycle of life and death. - Martine Vermeulen